Last Friday evening we played a game where I opened up Google Maps, spun the virtual globe, and then he would tell me a story about whatever place we landed on.
Paris? He’d lived there.
Tokyo? Lived there too, and he had a full set of samurai armor to prove it.
We didn’t get any work done that night, so he instituted a new rule: I could ask him one personal question each night. But beyond that, we had to focus on our work.
“Pssst,” said Chastity, spinning my chair so I was forced to look at some crazy spreadsheet she’d been working on.
“What exactly am I looking at here? I thought that Wineflix and Chill wasn’t going international until next year at the earliest?”
Chastity shook her head. “No, look. I’ve compiled a list of all the places that you’ve said Tanner lived or visited. And they’re color-coded by how old he must have been when they happened. I mean…I’m guessing tween Tanner didn’t get offered his choice of virgin while trekking through the Ugandan countryside.”
“That seems like a safe assumption.”
“Here’s the thing…all of this stuff would have been impossible for him to do unless he’d literally been traveling non-stop since his 16thbirthday.”
“Hmmm…” I scanned her list to check for errors, but her logic was sound. “Well we don’t know for sure that he’s 28. If he was like 36 then there would have been plenty of time for all this.”
“Or maybe he’s a vampire like we originally thought. An immortal being would have lots of time for travel.”
I sighed. I’d been giving this a lot of thought. Especially after Chastity had made a scene of not inviting Tanner into our cubicle like how you’re not supposed to invite vampires into your home. He’d stared at her like she was a crazy person. Which she was. So was I, but I was really beginning to think we were wrong about this. I’d been alone with Tanner a bunch and he hadn’t once tried to suck my blood. “I don’t know, Chastity. I’m starting to think vampires aren’t even real.”
“Say what? Or course they’re real. Don’t you find it odd that they’ve been mentioned in so many ancient cultures in completely different parts of the world?”
I shook my head. “He’s not a vampire. He goes out in the light all the time. And he has a reflection. Are you really going to make me waste my one question tonight to get him to confirm once and for all that he’s not a vampire?”
“No. But only because I wouldn’t trust his answer.”
“Trust what answer?” asked Tanner.
Chastity slammed her laptop shut as we spun around.
“Nothing,” we both said at the same time, sounding totally guilty.
“Well,” said Tanner, “you might want to spend a little less time trying to figure out my deep dark secret and more time on the Wineflix and Chill web design.”
“You wanted it by Friday, right?” I asked.
“Yes. But tomorrow is your day off, and we’re not going to get much work done tonight.” He locked eyes with me.
“Oh la la,” said Chastity. “Why won’t you be getting much work done tonight?”
Tanner gave me a mischievous smile. “It’s a surprise.”
I stared at him. How the hell was I supposed to focus on my work after he dropped that bomb on me?! “What kind of surprise?”
“A good one. No. Agreatone. A total gamechanger.” He turned and walked back to his office.
“Oh my God!” squealed Chastity. “Tonight’s the night.”
“For…?”
“He’s finally gonna bend you over his desk.”
I laughed. “I don’t know about that. I’m pretty sure he just meant he found a good new restaurant to order from.”
“That wouldn’t be a surprise. He gets you takeout every night.”
