Groggy and muzzy-headed, I rose and prepared to depart.
Outside the teepee, the barest sliver of dawn spread a soft wash of rose-colored ink across the dusky sky. Ahead, Marcellious and Emily stood in a clearing, kissing one another passionately. Seeing them sent splintered shards of grief through my heart. Oh, where was my husband? Would I really ever see him again, or would I be a lonely widow, taking comfort only in memories?
I turned away from them and headed to Grey Feather’s domicile.
“Chief Grey Feather,” I whispered outside his door.
“Little Moon.”
The voice came from behind me, and I was startled, whirling around.
There stood the chief, his hair dripping wet. He’d probably been performing his morning ablutions in the creek.
“I came to say goodbye,” I said, as spider-web filaments of respect stretched toward this great man.
Grey Feather looked at me for a long time, his expression revealing nothing. At last, he extended his gnarled hands to me.
I clasped them in mine, sparking a sudden onslaught of tears.
“Don’t be sad, Little Moon. Your time here with us has passed.” He reached up one of his weathered fingers and wiped the tears from my cheeks.
His touch felt kind and comforting, as I imagined being caressed by a beloved grandparent.
“How can you know that?”
“I have consulted our Great Spirit. Wakan Tanka has told me that our journey is complete but that you will find the answers you seek. Only good things….”
I brightened, sniffling back my sorrow. “That would be welcome for a change.”
The chief nodded. “There are still twists and turns on your way, but you will find what you seek. Little Moon, remember one thing. Your dagger is the strongest weapon you have. It has the power to show you your past, your present, and your future. It can help you speak to the dead and will help you heal your soul. Use it wisely. Employ its good uses.”
A shiver cascaded through me, and I felt I was granted a benediction of enormous importance. “Thank you, Grey Feather. That means a lot to me.”
I blinked back a few errant tears and then impulsively threw my arms around him.
Clad in his furry bison robes the way he was, I felt like I was embracing a gigantic shaggy beast, the kind that still roamed these great plains in vast numbers. Maybe our souls touched at that moment.
When I released him, he said, “Give my blessing to Emily and Hunting Wolf. You will always reside in my heart and prayers.”
“Thank you, chief. And you reside here also.” I pressed my palm to my chest. Then, before I dissolved into a blubbering mess, I spun on my heel and hurried toward Marcellious and Emily, eager to get on our way.
Olivia
I reined in my horse, hanging back on the journey to John James’ cottage.
Marcellious and Emily flirted and laughed like Roman and I used to. Marcellious kept leaning far to the right side of his steed for a kiss, which Emily obliged him. I fell back as far as I could get away with and did not lose sight of my companions. They were so distracted with one another that I was afraid I’d lose them if I were to pull into the lead. I was too frail to be out on my own.
I had to battle against my negative emotions and dark thoughts. If I lived in the twenty-first century, I’d be on some sort of anti-depressant prescription by now. Here I had nothing to remove the onslaught of words and thoughts vomiting from my mind, telling me I was a failure, I was weak, and I’d become a sub-life form who didn’t deserve to live.
The only thing that helped me escape this sad mental state was remembering times with Roman. The smell of him…the taste of him… His touch... The way he kissed me… How he drove his cock into me with furious passion…
I’d get lost in fantasies of the good times with Roman.
I felt joy over Marcellious and Emily’s union at those times. It seemed true love really had prevailed, and that love had transformed Marcellious’ demeanor. But would it last in the long run, or would he slide back into his despicable self?
“Jesus, Olivia,” I muttered. “Since when did you become the eternal reminder that life could be pathetic and miserable? You used to be the one to inspire and bring hope. Now, it’s like you have nothing good to say about anything.”
I shook the pessimism from my shoulders and urged my horse to a trot to catch up to the two lovebirds ahead.
