Even though I’m not sure I’d be able to do what he’s done, I can recognize the good in his actions.
“He is,” there’s a wistful quality to her voice which hits me right in the chest. “All my brothers are.”
“Then why are you nervous about going home?”
She looks at me, really looks at me, after I let the question slip out without even trying to hide the curiosity in my voice.
Carson is kind of a mystery and has been since she started at Vibrant Ink. She’s been in Denver for around ten years, from what I remember. The shop she used to work at, the same one where she apprenticed, has a pretty stellar reputation for their work. But there are also a lot of whispers and rumors about the owner.
I met him at a convention a few years ago and was glad that I got my spot at Vibrant Ink instead of needing to hunt one down in his shop. It wasn’t anything I could put my finger on, just the vibe I got from him.
Carson hasn’t spoken badly of the guy or her time at his shop. Maybe we just haven’t pushed enough.
She’s a good person and extremely talented, but she’s been with us for less than two years. Is it possible that she still feels like an outsider when it comes to us? The thought makes me frown.
Perhaps she’s not a mystery. Maybe it’s more like we haven’t let her into the inner circle, one forged of years upon years of working side by side.
That’s on us. On me.
“It’s just been a while,” her voice is low, and I have to strain to hear her. “While I wasn’t the black sheep of the family because I was also the only girl, I always felt out of place in Wintervale. I dreamed of something more, something bigger. And I went out and found it.”
Her words might be prideful, but her tone, which is filled with sadness, isn’t. The hollowness in her words have me almost reaching out and hugging her against my chest to offer her comfort.
But she’s never been all that keen on physical contact. Neither have I, for that matter.
“They’ll be happy to see you,” I offer while hoping she can’t tell I’m only guessing.
The thought of having a family, one bound by blood, is foreign to me. Once I left behind the mother who raised me and thechaos of the life that she forced me to live within, I never looked back. I never even thought about it or inviting the misery from the past into my present.
I’m better off for it.
But I also know not everyone experienced family the way I did. Vibrant Ink has become my family, one which allows me space when I need it. They’ll obliterate that space sometimes when I’m trying to cling to it.
“And before the wedding, there’s the convention in Vegas,” I remind her, feeling the need to get off this carousel of a conversation.
Hopefully, she’ll let me off. And join me. Nothing good can come from the way she’s stewing, especially when it feels like there’s so much that she hasn’t said.
“Yeah,” Carson agrees, but it’s half-hearted at best.
With a shake of her head, she flashes me a grin and nods toward the smaller bar in the VIP area. “I’m going to grab another drink, you need one?”
And that’s one thing I’ve come to realize about Carson, when she’s done talking about something and wants to move on, she just does. While others in the shop might push, that’s not me.
“I’m good,” I tell her before looking toward the dance floor and the bar not in the VIP area. “I think I’m going to hit the bathroom.”
I think she says something before she walks away, but I catch a glimpse of a beautiful blonde woman at the bar, and the blood starts to roar in my ears as it rushes through my veins. The noise fades and the only thing I can see, even as the lights strobe, is this woman.
Who the fuck is she?
My feet move without me even realizing it. The next thing I know, I’m standing next to the woman while my palms sweat, and a feeling of panic starts to set in. I don’t know what this feeling is, and I’m not sure I like it.
What is it that I’m even feeling?
Anticipation thrums through me making it difficult to breathe. Fuck. I’m going to embarrass myself right now. I’m powerless to stop it from happening.
“Cheers,” the woman next to the blonde beauty I can’t look away from crows. Damn, I didn’t even notice someone next to the woman who caught my attention at first. “Here’s to finally getting you out with me.”
Somehow, the knowledge that this woman, whoever the hell she is, doesn’t go out much, at least not with the friend she’s with, helps to settle some of the anxiety running through me. The smile on the blonde’s face looks forced as she eyes the drink in her hand with far too much trepidation for an Old Fashioned.
