“No,” she said through her sob. “You have to go.” There was so much pain in her voice.
“Kennedy, I’m not going anywhere until I see you.” I needed to pull her into my arms. I needed to tell her that no matter what was wrong, she had me now. We were an us. I wanted to take away her pain.
“Matt, please, I can’t do this. Please just go.”
“I don’t know what’s going on, but I know what’ll make you feel better. I have fries.”
There was a muffled sob. “You can leave those by the door.”
“Kennedy, you’re being ridiculous. Let me in right now, or…I’ll knock down the door.”
“No you won’t.”
“Yes I will. I’m dead serious.” This door looked pretty flimsy, honestly. I made a mental note to get the Alcarazes a more secure door.
My threat was greeted by silence.
“Okay. I’m doing it,” I said. I set down the fries and flowers and stood up.
But before I could ram my shoulder into the side of the door, Kennedy opened the door the tiniest crack and squeezed through. She gently closed it behind her. Her eyes were red and the tears weren’t even dry on her cheeks. She looked like she might be sick. But I didn’t even care if it was contagious. I needed her in my arms.
I pulled her close, but felt her hand against my chest, pushing me back.
“Kennedy…”
“Please don’t touch me,” she said through another sniffle.
I took a step back, even though it pained me. I’d always listen to her telling me no. I knew what she’d been through. And I wouldn’t put her in that position again.
She folded her arms across her chest, but it wasn’t in anger. It was more like she was hugging herself. Holding herself together. She was looking down at the ground, like she couldn’t even look at me.
“Kennedy.” What the hell was going on? What happened to the flirtatious texts? We were on the same page here. I knew that we were. What the hell had happened in the last half hour? “Kennedy?” I said a little softer.
“We’re done, Matt,” she said.
“What?”
She finally looked up at me. And her eyes didn’t match her words. She looked like she wanted to be back in my arms. Like she wanted me to kiss away the tears on her cheeks.
“Baby…”
“Don’t,” she said more firmly. “I’m so sorry. About all of it. I wish I could just undo the last few days. I just want to undo them.” The tears started streaming down her cheeks again.
“How can you say that?”
She just shook her head.
“Whatever you think is wrong with us…we can work it out.”
“Matt, we were always meant to be friends. Nothing more.”
Every word out of her mouth was a complete lie. I needed to pull her into my arms. I needed to show her that she was wrong. But she’d told me not to touch her. And I couldn’t. I couldn’t cross that line when she’d told me no.
I felt paralyzed. I needed to make her understand how wrong she was. So I said the first words that popped into my head: “I love you.”
She shook her head. And her bottom lip trembled as she tried to hold it together.
“I’m in love with you,” I said again.
