I tell him the miserable ten hours of labor, and then about her birth, and how Finn had picked out the name Madison.He chose it because it was a play on both his dad’s middle name and Mateo’s name.Frankly, Finn thought it was hilarious.We’d have two mad kids, and it sort of fit us.
I pause at the end of the chapter, and speak freely so I can relay the truth and explain how the one thing Finn didn’t count on with naming our daughter Madison, or Maddie for short, was how freaking confusing it was, because no one knows who we were talking about—our older son or our little girl.
It’s at that point that I hear footsteps and look behind me to see Lacy, my little sister, walking towards me.She’s more wiry than I am, and taller, with honey blonde hair that rests just below her shoulders.She’s wearing ripped jeans, flip-flops, and a hippie-themed graphic T-shirt.
“Hey,” she says as she takes a seat on the blanket beside me.
“Hey, yourself”.I pull her immediately into a hug.When we pull away, I smooth some hair away from her cheek and smile.“How’d you find me?”
“Stopped by the new house.Finn said I’d find you here.”
“I thought you weren’t getting into town until tomorrow.”I eye her nude makeup and the slight sunburn on her skin, which is probably from her driving here in her Jeep with the top down.
“I decided to take a sick day so I could get here a day earlier and spend a four-day weekend with my favorite niece.”
“She’s a handful, isn’t she?”
She laughs and nods.“Yeah, she’s like a mini you.When I pulled away from the house, she was doing cartwheels on the lawn in her Tinker Bell wings and a purple tutu.She did so many she fell right back down the minute she stood up.”
I shake my head and laugh along with her.
“And Finn?”
“He was on the porch step, drinking coffee and watching her.Are you kidding?She wouldn’t let him out of her sight.She was all ‘Daddy, watch this.Daddy, look what I can do.’”
A grin overtakes my face, and I huff out a laugh.Because, yes, she has him completely wrapped around her finger, and if that girl loves anything, it’s playing dressup and performing for not just Finn, but anyone who comes to our house to visit.
I indulge her, and sometimes, I even put on a costume of my own, and we play make-believe.Whether we’re fairies, pirates, or superheroes, we go all in, and every so often, we wrangle Finn into participating in our adventures.
“So whatcha doin’?”Lacy eyes the open book on my lap and Finn’s dad’s headstone.
“Just reading to him.It’s something Finn and I do.”I close the book on my lap and shrug.
Lacy tilts her head and gives me a warm smile.“Do I ever get to hear this story of yours.Well, I guess yours and Finn’s.”
“You can buy it and read it, you know.It’s online.”
“Yeah, I know, but I want you to tell it to me.”
Moisture builds behind my eyes, and I shake my head and look up for a moment as I try to fight the tears back.
“Fuck.I hate getting older.The hormones are the freaking worst.It’s like being pregnant all over again.”
“It’s called being in touch with your emotions.You’ll get used to it.”
“Yeah, no thanks.I’d rather not,” I say as I get to my feet.
“Yeah, I’m not sure I’m going to like that part either.”She bites her bottom lip and looks down at the ground, and then back up at me.Her eyes dart away.
“What?”
For the first time, I fully take her in.When she rests her hand over the small bump showing from under her shirt, my brain nearly explodes.
“No…”
She takes a long inhale and nods.“Don’t be mad.It just sort of happened the last time I came to visit.It was that night you and Finn left early from Hodge’s.Bodie and I started talking and dancing, and one thing led to another.That’s the other reason I’m here.Bodie wants to give things a go and wants to take care of me while I go through this part.”
“Bodie’s the father?”
