He sighs. “Yeah. So have you. In good ways, though. You’re an amazing mom. You’re beautiful, and an incredible role model for both your daughter and mine.”
His words surprise me. I wasn’t expecting him to bring up the Christmas party, the night I thought things were going to change between us. “Why did you ask about that?”
I can practically hear him pondering his words through the phone. “It’s one of my favorite memories of you.”
I try to think of something else to say, but Jason speaks first.
“I should let you go,” his words are abrupt, a fast change to the way he’d been speaking to me only moments ago.
I nod, knowing he’s right. “Let me know how Lennie is. I’m always here for you, Jase.”
“Thanks, Fallon,” he replies. “Goodnight.”
“Night,” I say, and the call ends with a beep.
13
JASON
July
“Jason, what are you doing next weekend?” Isaac asks as we finish up our meeting. I try to join a meeting once a month since we started the contract with Meadow Grove. Fallon already left after giving a cheerful update about the feedback she’s received from her most recent brides and how much they’re loving Blue Ox.
It’s exciting, and the brewery has been busier as a result. Laila has taken it upon herself to revamp our social media pages too, and that, coupled with the extra publicity from having the beer at weddings, has been an awesome upgrade.
I glance up at Isaac, who has his phone in his palm, the calendar app open.
“Um,” I reply, pulling up my own calendar. “Right now, nothing. But you never know.”
“I’d pay for it, but would you be interested in going to a conference in the Twin Cities with me?” He taps out something on his phone, showing me the screen. “It’s an eventand vendor weekend, and I thought it could be good for you to go, maybe get your name out there too.”
He passes me his phone, and I look through the event and the schedule. In all honesty, I don’t know how I feel about going. A few of the speakers look interesting, and I know I'd probably have a good time, but the thought of leaving Lennie on top of the overall effort it would take to leave for a weekend deters me from giving an answer right away. I would rather stay home and soak up some extra time with my daughter, but he’s right. It could be good for business.
“I’d have to get back to you, it depends on if I can find someone for Lenners,” I reply, passing him back his phone.
“No problem,” he replies. “I’ve asked Fallon and a few of the girls to come too, so it would be a group of us. Let me know, and I can get your room booked.”
“Great,” I reply, but I’m trying not to react. I’ve been avoiding Fallon since our late evening chat a few weeks ago when Lennie was sick. I panicked, and I still don’t know why I called her. I didn’t need to dump all my feelings and emotionally vomit on her. But I did. Internally, I grimace. I can’t let myself fall into something with her, not again. I was destroyed after she left the first time, and I was destroyed each time Talia left. People leave. I can’t let myself get attached, and I definitely can’t let Lennie get attached. It’s not good for either of us.
I admit, it was nice to chat and it felt familiar, comfortable, but, still. I didn’t need to do that to her, no matter how many times she said it was okay. And going as far as bringing up the Christmas party? I can’t believe I did that. That night was something I tried to forget, but never could. It was the closest we’d ever gotten to something more. Something that will never happen between us. Hearingher say I’ve changed though? That settled deep in me. I wish I was still the person I was in college, but life happened.
“I’ll let you know,” I tell Isaac, standing up from the chair. I have to get back to the brewery today and get some work done there, so I head out of the conference room and down the hall.
“Jason!” I hear Fallon’s cheery voice call. She’s in a great mood today, if her voice and excitement during the meeting are any tell. I halt my steps, turning to face her. As always, she looks adorable in her business attire. Today she’s wearing a navy blue blazer that brings out the hint of blue in her green eyes I’m so drawn to every time I look at her. “Hey,” she greets. “How’s it going?”
“Fine,” I reply curtly . I can’t let myself give her more, because I can’t trust myself with her. I need to try and distance myself again after the talk of the Christmas party.
She raises a blonde brow. “Fine? Presley was raving about their trip to the museum the other day.”
“Lennie was too,” I say. “She had a lot of fun.”
“They’ll have to do it again.”
“Sure,” I state.
“Are you going to the conference next weekend?”
I shrug. “Not sure. I just found out about it. It depends on if my mom can watch Lennie. If I even want to ask her to.”
