I was the therapist here. And that made no sense. “I’ll take that into consideration.”
“Sugar, listen.” Sylvie ran her hand over my messy ponytail. “When bad things happen to us as children, we create habits to survive.”
“I know that.”
“Seeing Buck again doesn’t really change anything, does it?” she asked.
“I thought if I heard his apology or his motivation for abandoning his kids, it might somehow magically be freeing.”News flash: it hadn’t. “I’ve seen him a few times. I can confirm he did apologize, and he’s still a mess.”
“So you’ve decided to help him,” Olivia guessed.
“Can we get back to how angry we are at Miller?”Please?
“We can’t tell you to stay away from Buck,” Sylvie said. “But we can tell you we love you and want you to be careful.”
“And you don’t need anything Buck can or can’t give you,” Rosie said. “He hurt you and Colin so badly. Take his apology, then leave him alone. Shut the book. Thentossthe book. End of story.”
“I agree,” said Sylvie. “Send Buck a yearly Christmas card if you must, but don’t let him suck you into being taken advantage of.”
“You did catch the part where he said he was sorry, right?” I felt oddly defensive of the man who had abandoned his children.
“Yes.” Sylvie did not look impressed. “But conveniently only when you sought him out and put him on the spot. Where’s that apology been the last twenty years?”
I didn’t have an answer to that, and I didn’t like that it probably mattered.
Sylvie tapped her nail to her chin. “Miller told you he wanted to make your relationship work, correct?”
“Yes, but—”
“And,” she continued, “he admitted he absolutely adored you and wanted you in his life.”
“He did, but—”
“Buck basically told you the same things,” Sylvie continued. “Yet it’s Buck who’s getting the second chance.” She rested her soft, completely immovable cheek against mine. “I think you need to ask yourself why. The two are certainly related. And furthermore, why did you stay in all those toxic relationships, but Miller, who has required no fixing, no micromanaging, no enabling help, he’s the one you’ve turned loose?”
“It’s because she’s scared,” said Olivia. “Here’s a guy who actually makes her feel all the things she’s supposed toandwho probably loves her. Hattie’s never experienced that, so she’s running.”
I did not appreciate Olivia’s tone or her diagnosis. “He didnotsay he loved me. Besides, Miller and I would never work.”
“What a convenient thing to tell yourself.” Olivia slipped her book into her bag.
“He didn’t even bother telling me he’s moving, essentially leaving Hope Farms,” I reminded them.
Frannie nibbled on a cookie. “That is an important detail. Not cool, dude. Want me and Sylvie to exact revenge? I like the boy, so I’m thinking something mild.”
“No, I don’t want Miller hurt,” I said. “But he could’ve mentioned his plans. If I hadn’t overheard his conversation, I still wouldn’t know.”
“What was his excuse?” Rosie asked.
The answer was still a bit unclear. “He said he didn’t think moving was going to affect our relationship much. As if life would just go on normally with us in different states.”
Sylvie patted my shoulder. “Hon, Miller made a huge mistake. Giant. But it doesn’t mean you can’t trust him, does it?”
Rosie pushed up her glasses. “It also doesn’t mean he’s not committed to your relationship. If you care about someone, you can make long-distance work.”
Olivia nodded in vehement agreement. “Hattie, if you truly find that your heart isn’t in your relationship with Miller, then, sure, let him go. If you’re bored in his presence, turned off by his touch—”
“Find he doesn’t look good in fur and fangs.” Frannie glanced at each of us. “Sometimes after a good book I find it hard to transition back to real life.” She inspected the moon decal on her nail. “Just me?”
