“No. This world needs you.Ineed you.” I regret my omission the second it leaves my lips as she whimpers at the reminder. Even handling her as gently as I am, I know I’m hurting her, and it kills me. “If this is what it takes to keep you safe…it’s an easy choice, Red.”
She searches my gaze for any hint of a lie, but she won’t find it. I’ve all but cracked open my ribs with my bare hands, my thumping heart steadily keeping pace with hers as I lay my truth at her feet. She pulls against the cuffs tethering her to the heater, beckoning me forward with pleading puffy eyes as she sniffles around a broken sob. I don’t hesitate, basking in her warmth as I crowd her body with mine, imprinting the silent promise ofalwaysthrough our connection. It isn’t long enough, I knew it wouldn’t be, but all good things must come to an end. For allmy faults I’ve been fortunately afforded more than a sinner like me deserves, and when the darkness beckons me forward, it will be her face I’ll see. I tuck a strand of her hair behind her ear, my fingers lingering over her pulse point as I rest my forehead against hers.
For a small woman, the shadow she casts down over Cara and me as she stands beside us is a sign in and of its own that Lenora’s ego isn’t contained to her small stature—she radiates the hate and the darkness like it’s a living, breathing second skin.
“Time’s ticking,” Lenora gripes, her manicured finger teasing the trigger of the gun in her grip.
I fight against my natural urge to go rogue and try to take her down, and simply do as instructed. Risking Cara’s life, even in a situation as shitty as this one, isn’t worth it. Lenora wouldn’t need much of a reason to shoot her, and if I’m forced to watch Cara die, she’ll make sure I live long enough for the grief to destroy me. I’d rather accept my fate and get it over with. Maybe my father’s waiting in hell to greet me with a whiskey; living or dying was never as predictable as I thought.
Stroking her cheek with a steady hand, I linger in the comfort of her warmth for a moment longer, her eyes filled with unshed tears bouncing between mine as she silently pleads with me not to let her go.
I get to my feet and walk towards Caleb of my own volition, his tight half smile meant to be comforting but severely lacking. I turn and drop to my knees, my gaze trained on Cara, desperate for a few more seconds of her as I silently pray that whatever trip south I have into the belly of hell, it will be with the image of her tethered to my soul. I’ve never much thought about an afterlife, but a warmth spreads through my chest, and I hold onto that sliver of hope she swore I had the ability to conjure—and I allow myself to believe that if I do get another stab at this existing shit,in whatever life it is—I’ll find her, claiming her as mine time and time again for an eternity.
I watch as Cooper sets down the key to the handcuffs just out of reach of Cara, knowing if she moves too quickly before I’m injected, she’ll get a bullet to the head for her troubles. I see the wink Cooper throws her way; she shakes her head, a pleading gaze penetrating my soul when her face falls.
“Close your eyes Cara,” I order gruffly. She shakes her head, her baby blue ocean eyes red-rimmed and filled with sorrow as her lips tremble. I’d smile at her brattiness and promise her a spanking, if death wasn’t so imminent.
“Let the man have some dignity,” Cooper says as he pulls a blade from his boot and severs the rope knotted around my wrists before Lenora can say a word.
I brace myself for the sting of the needle, refusing to close my eyes as I gaze across at Cara, deciding I don’t care what they are about to pump into my veins if it buys her some time. I don’t react as it pierces my skin, wincing slightly as the cool liquid enters a vein. It’s all over quickly, and Caleb slides the needle out. I sway, hooded eyes still locked on her as death beckons me forward. I had hoped the Knox brothers would be able to work some magic and get me the fuck out of here, but no one expected Lenora would have this planned. A cold river fills my chest as pain radiates throughout my torso. I hit the floor with a thwack, watching the pain of witnessing my death tear Cara up as she scrambles to get free. I fight against the pull to close my eyes for as long as I can. I watch helpless as Simon winds his good hand around her hair, forcing her head up as she screams out for me.
“You won’t want to miss this,” he whispers into her ear loud enough for the words to reach me, his wild grimace contorting as he basks in the shrill whimper that tumbles from her lips, her body slumped in defeat.
Time seems to slow down as objects in the room bleed into one another, a cataclysmic melding of figures, colours, and shapes. The slowing thump of my heart leisurely eclipses all other noise in the room, and for the first time since she arrived, I feel alone again.
“Hope” is the only word that passes my dying lips before the nothingness drags me under its blackened surface and the lights go out. Of all the things I had to show for my sorry existence, her belief in me—the love she showed me that was possible, that is what I hold onto as I witness the final moments of my life fade away.
Her.
Then. Now. For always.
Her.
CHAPTER THIRTY
CARA
It took me a moment to realise the key Cooper left on the table was for my handcuffs. I reach for it in a panic, trying to hook my foot around the leg of the table to pull it closer, my vision blurry through the tears.
Simon’s grip tightens around my hair, pain prickling on my scalp. Flailing, I watch helplessly as the drugs in Ezra’s system start to take hold. His large body sways, his eyelids heavy. Lenora continues to talk, but I’ve blocked her out, uncaring of what she has to say as desperation to run to Ezra strangles me. My throat is dry, my lungs struggling to take in a full breath. I don’t think; I just act. Kicking Simon between his legs, he wails, letting go of my hair and stumbling into the table as he cups his crotch. The key clatters across the floor as he grips the metal edge to stay upright.
I curse myself for not thinking of it earlier as I awkwardly unbuckle my glove and slip out of my prosthetic. My hand slides out of the cuff easily. I scramble for the key to get my other wrist free, pain searing through my shoulder as I stretch it to its limit. Shoving it into the lock, I free myself and clamour across the floor to Ezra’s side. I welcome the bullet from Lenora’s gun should she choose to follow through with her threat as I feelhis clammy skin against my palm. I struggle to hold his broad muscular frame against my body as the last remnants of life seeps out of him.
“Ezra, please wake up,” I plead but get no response, lowering my trembling lips to his, my chest tight as nausea unfurls in my belly. “Ezra, I said wake up,” I demand more forcefully. Willing him to chastise me for my bratty tone. But still nothing. Hollowed out, a numbness skitters through my extremities, the monotonous tick of the clock affirming as each second without him passes.
“Well, I wasn’t expecting that; any other body parts you’re missing, Little Miss Houdini? I guess I don’t know everything.” Her cackle is like nails on a chalkboard as I shudder, the tears streaming down my raw cheeks halting as a blaze of rage descends over my vision, the numbness lifting as a sheen of sweat coats my skin. Gripping onto the tatters of what remains of my humanity, I bend, laying a trembling kiss on Ezra’s cheek before settling his head on the ground. Clenching my firsts, I run at her, getting in one good hit and hopefully breaking something.
I don’t know what Simon hits me with as I spot his bat discarded by the hearth fire in my peripheral, but in a flash, I’m on the floor, my eyelids heavy, the likelihood of another serious concussion at this point added to the laundry list of damage my body has already endured.I make a note to tell future Cara to take some ibuprofen.The hit wasn’t hard enough to knock me out, but it is enough to incapacitate me. The room around me blurs, their voices muffled as my brain struggles to process everything. The dirt and debris from the floor cakes my cheek, the mixed scent of my burnt flesh from my branding and the spilt blood decorating the room filling my nose.
“Ezra,” I whimper, not knowing whether I’ve even spoken his name aloud. There’s a blissful comfort to feeling this catatonic, my hand trembling as I reach over, barely brushing against hiscooling skin. Unshed tears blur my vision of him as he lays motionless inches from my face. I can’t muster the energy it would take to wipe them away. Gasping for air, I suck down the pain, burying it away out of sight. Groaning, I drag myself closer to him and drape myself around his torso like a shield. Reality claws at my fuddled senses, screaming at me that he’s gone, but I refuse to listen. The burden of my grief settles heavy in my gut, my limbs weightless as I knot my fingers into his torn-open shirt. I have never spoken to God; I’ve never seen the point. My life has always been more in keeping with that of the devil than any higher power promising grace and forgiveness, but as I lay here, feeling more alone than I ever have before, I vow to trade my life for his, to give everything I have just to see his chest rise and fall one more time.
We’ve come too far for this to be our end.
“Breathe, dammit. Please…” My broken plea is a fractured, pitiful sound. The storm of emotion feels like tar as it paints my insides a murky black, the walls of my sanity closing in and threatening to pull me under the surface as I drown in my misery.
Pressing my cheek to his chest, I ignore the ache that feels like an iron grip around my heart. I close my eyes, and on a choppy exhale, release the plea that holds more strength than I thought possible in this moment.
“Take me with you.”
