“No, I know you.I know better than to offer financial help. But it’s been a few years, you’ve moved out of their house, so I wondered if you were still helping your parents out. Maybe now—with everything that’s going on with your job—maybe now’s a good time for a change.”
Hannah shook her head. “It’s not as easy as that. I have bills and responsibilities, and there’s…” She sighed. “It’s just not that easy.”
“Nothing worth doing ever is. So say you got to go back and change that decision—take the college route—what would you have studied?”
“That’s just it—I don’t know. I didn’t have time to do the whole college thing, take a bunch of classes, and figure out what I wanted to do with my life. And now I don’t have the time to waste to figure it out.”
“What classes did you like in secondary school—whatdo you call it? High school?”
“I really loved math, working a problem that had a definite solution. I also liked government and history. Nothing that would make a career at the end of four years of college. What do you even do with that?”
“Maybe take some classes in finance? Or business? Then you can always intern in a few companies while going to school, in order to see if it’s something you’dlike to do full-time.”
“Maybe.” Hannah frowned.
“You know we have a fabulous university in Monaco, an English-language university that has renown finance and international busin—”
“Are you kidding me? I can’t just uproot my entire life on a whim. Besides, I can’t afford college here at UNLV, let alone foreign tuition. I can maybe swing community college, and that’s only if I’m working at thesame time.”
“I could—”
“Not happening.” Hannah glared at me like I’d offered her something offensive. “I wouldn’t let you sort out a job for me last night. Do you really think I’m gonna let you pay for my schooling? This whole conversation has just spun out of control.”
“Hannah, will you let me talk? I wasn’t going to offer to pay your tuition. I could help with housing and the applicationprocess. There are scholarships and financial aid you could apply for. How will you know unless you try? And how else can we see if what’s between us is going to work? We need more time together. We deserve more time together.”
“Because this is love?” Hannah pulled away from me and wiped at her eyes with no regard to her makeup, leaving smudges behind. “This was only supposed to be one night,maybe two, and then we’d both go our separate ways. Youknowit. Heck, we’ve only known each other three whole days. You can’t turn this into something more because you want to.”
“I wasn’t aware we were working on a strict timeline. Don’t sometimes you just know? You feel it inside? Besides, when have I ever played by the rules? Hell, my father and now my brother have harped on me enough timesfor leaping without looking. At least this time I got a huge preview before I leapt.”
“Preview? What the heck does that mean?”
I tilted my head toward the blanket and raised my eyebrows.
“You did not just ask for sex in the middle of a fucking argument!”
I shrugged. “Can’t blame me for trying.”
“Yes, I can. And I do! Holy crap, I am stuck in the middle of nowhere with a lunatic. We’re talkingabout our lives, our future, and you want to get laid.”
“C’est pas impossible. Sex is life and death. It’s the ultimate expression of being alive. And do you know what the French call an orgasm?La petite mort.Which literally translates to ‘the little death.’ ”
“Yes, thank you, Wikipedia Brown, for that little jaunt down insanity lane. You’re still not getting laid.” Hannah rolled her eyesso hard it was a wonder they stayed in her head.
“Ah,ma chérie. I think you’ll change your mind when I turn up the charm. No one can say no to the allure of Prince Luc.”
Hannah snorted. “Okay, now you just sound like Pepé Le Pew.”
Merde!Hannah just compared me to a lovesick cartoon skunk. After a second of stunned silence, I laughed so hard that tears sprang into my eyes. It only took a fewseconds for Hannah’s laughter to join mine. She collapsed on the blanket next to me giggling like a fool while she clutched at her stomach.
Once our laughter faded away, I reached up and brushed a strand of hair off her cheek. “I want more time with you, Hannah. We both deserve that.”
She shook her head slightly. “I can’t promise that. Neither can you.”
“No, but I can promise that I’ll do everythingin my power to spend more time with you. I will make an effort if you’ll just let me in.”
Some indecipherable expression passed over her face, but before I could even try to put a name to it, it disappeared as Hannah gave me a small smile that didn’t reach her eyes. She ducked her head and snuggled into my shoulder. “That sounds great. Thank you, Luc.”
“Thank you for trusting me with your secret.We’ll figure something out.”
I held Hannah in my arms for a while as we lay on the blanket, my hands never moving from her shoulders. It felt like we were on the edge of a precipice and the slightest movement would send us tumbling over. I was scared. It was humbling to admit as much to myself. I’d finally found someone I wanted to explore more than one night with, and she was doing everythingshe could to push me away—and there was very little I could do about it. Time and circumstances were not on my side. The distance alone was daunting.
But I silently promised myself and her again that I’d do everything in my power to make sure that we had a chance.
I held Hannah until the radio crackled with static, but no voice came over the waves. I knew it was my security team checking onus; that our time was up. With an apologetic smile to Hannah, I radioed the boys to come pick us up and we packed our idyllic picnic away, the mood shattered.
I held Hannah the entire drive back to the hotel and all night long in my bed. We didn’t speak much or do much more than kiss, but I felt better having her in my arms and I thought she felt the same.
Right up to the moment I awoke thenext morning to an empty bed, and a Dear John note on the pillow next to me.
