After blowing the air out of my lungs and trying to find the right words to explain what I was thinking, I say, “I need a drink. I’ll be right back.”
They don’t stop me, so I walk inside and head for the bar since it’s definitely a bourbon kind of conversation we’re about to have. I pour myself a glass and down it before pouring a second glass. I have to call the doorman at the building so Ava can get up to see Eden, and then I take a deep breath in and brace myself for what’s to come.
When I get back outside, I see my brothers are waiting for some answers. Just the fact that I’m expected to explain to them all that’s happened with Eden is proof I was right about hiding our relationship.
I sit down and take a big gulp of my drink. There’s no escaping the King brothers inquisition.
“So start from the beginning,” Matthias says like he’s speaking for the family.
Glaring at him, I say, “The fact that I have to explain myself at all is part of the damn problem.”
All three of my brothers look at one another and then train their focus on me again. “What does that mean?” Matthias asks.
Clearly, he is in charge of speaking for the family.
I take another drink and answer, “It means I’ve never had a single goddamned thing to myself. I’ve always been one of five. The five King brothers. The problem is I’ve never been anyone special. I’m not the oldest like you, Matthias. I’m not the youngest like you, Ronan. I’m not the one destined to be a businessman and follow in Dad’s footsteps like you, Kellen. Even when Theo was still alive I wasn’t special like him. I’ve always been the exact middle King and that’s it. All my fucking life I’ve been known as one of five. But with Eden, it was just me, and I loved that as much as I loved her.”
I stop for a moment and correct myself. “Love her.”
“You’re the photographer in the family, Marius. That’s something none of us have,” Matthias says.
Shaking my head at his attempt to make me feel better, I smile. “No, because you’re the artist in the family.”
“So that’s why you didn’t want us to know you were married?” Ronan asks, and I hear the hurt in his voice.
“I just wanted to have something all to myself. That’s what my relationship with Eden was for me.”
Nobody says anything for a few minutes. All the better. I can’t think of anything but what Eden must be feeling right now anyway.
“So it’s a real love thing between you two?” Kellen asks in an uncharacteristically serious way.
I nod as I can’t help but smile. “Yeah. I’m crazy about her. That penthouse Ava’s going to? It’s Eden’s. I bought it for her.”
Matthias stares at me wide-eyed after hearing that. “You bought a million dollar penthouse for a wife you were keeping hidden?”
I chuckle at that ridiculous price for a penthouse on the Upper East Side. “Try fifteen million.”
The youngest King steps forward and says, “You bought her a fifteen million dollar penthouse? I don’t understand this, Marius. I mean, I get that you didn’t want to tell us, although I really don’t understand why, but you clearly care about this woman. What did you think would happen when you insisted on the two of you keeping your marriage a secret?”
I shrug because I’m not sure what they want me to say. “I didn’t think of anything but wanting to keep her all to myself. It was so nice to just be one person with another person. I didn’t have to be anyone but the man who married her. You have no idea how great that felt.”
None of my brothers respond, not surprisingly. They’ve never felt like they got lost in the shuffle of being one of five. Each one of the men around me has always been able to live with the niche they were assigned by birth. They have no idea how envious I’ve always been of that ability of theirs.
Matthias may have always hated the expectations put on him, but he’s handled them well and even enjoys being in charge of the family business now. Ronan may have wanted to be anyone but the youngest son growing up, but he knows he’s enjoyed the benefits of that spot in the birth order. And Kellenmay not love the fact that Matthias didn’t have to do a thing to get to be the head of King Industries, but he’s been able to be the person he’s always known he wanted to be even with Matthias being above him.
And me? All I’ve ever been is Marius King, the younger brother of Matthias and Theo and the older brother of Kellen and Ronan. That’s how teachers referred to me every year of school. That’s still how people refer to me. No matter what I’ve tried to be in life, it was never more important than being one of the five King brothers.
“I had no idea you felt this way, Marius. I’m sorry if I’ve done anything to make you feel like you weren’t special in your own right,” Matthias says.
“It’s not anything any of you have done. It’s just the way it is. Don’t get me wrong. I’m not blind to all the benefits I’ve gotten being one of Max and Elizabeth King’s children. I’ve got enough money to last my lifetime and more. I can do whatever I want in this world. There are billions of people on this planet who would probably wish they could be me. I know that.”
For a second, I stop and then let out a heavy sigh. “But I also know I liked it when it was just Eden and me.”
Leave it to Ronan to ask the one question I don’t want to answer.
“I know what you’re saying, but how do you think that made Eden feel?”
For a long moment, I don’t say a word because I don’t want to admit the truth. I know how she felt. She’s been telling me for the past two years that she wanted the world to know about us. She’s said it in every way possible, and still, I told her I needed more time.
