I needed someone to want me.
Cash said he wanted me. But did he really? Or was I just a replacement for the woman he lost?
My eyes scrunched up, closing tight. They were stirring again. I could feel them. Tiny little squiggles under my skin. Letting me know they were hungry.
I scratched at my legs. I had thirty minutes before I needed to leave to meet him. I had skipped Trudy’s this morning. My appetite nonexistent.
The monsters woke when I got back to the motel. They never let me go to bed without feeding them first.
What surprised me was how silent they were around Cash. They didn’t pester me for blood. They didn’t hold back the emotions. They were silent. Almost as if they had left.
They never left though. I knew they were biding their time. Letting me feel things I hadn’t felt in years just so they could show me how much I needed them.
That’s what happened when I got back to my room. Everything came crashing down and I couldn’t handle it. My heart was racing so fast that I thought it might give out.
Four cuts.
That’s what it took to appease them. Four cuts for the four hours I spent with Cash on the mountain.
It was a small price to pay. I had plenty of blood and my body made more all the time. I would never run out.
As long as they didn’t keep demanding more.
When I made it to the mountain, Cash was waiting. The smile on his face when he saw me made all the cuts, all the pain, and all the blood worth it.
He smiled like he was happy I was here.
“Hi,” I said. I could feel the blush creeping up my neck.
“Come here.” Cash grabbed my hand and pulled me to him. His lips descending on mine in a rush.
His large hands cradled my head as he leaned over and kissed me. My mouth opened for him and his tongue brushed mine. He didn’t let up.
“I want you so fucking much, Rose.”
I want you, too!
His lips made a path down my neck and he added, “I want to bury my tongue in your pussy until you’re screaming my name.” My body shivered against him as he continued, “Then I want to bury my cock deep inside you and never leave.”
“Cash,” I moaned.
Before I knew it, his hands were under my shirt. His thumbs grazed my nipples, and my body shuddered.
“Do you want me to make you come, baby?”
“Yes,” I breathed. I wanted him so fucking bad. I wanted to feel his hands everywhere. Squeezing me, caressing me. I wanted to feel his hands run up the inside of my legs and part my thighs... but when his hands went to my jeans, I remembered the scars. It was so easy to forget the monsters and what they demanded from me when I was in his arms.
“What’s wrong?” he asked, searching my eyes.
“Nothing. I thought we were going to talk.”
“You’re right,” he sighed. How long would he wait? How long could I put him off from discovering my secret? How long could I resist the way he made me feel, the way he made me forget?
He watched me for any hint of a reason to why I stopped him again. I stopped him every time he got a little too close. He wouldn’t wait forever. And eventually I would have to make a decision.
Tell him the truth.
Or leave him.
