“Maybe it’s both,” she said.
“Maybe it is.”
Chapter Eighteen
Cash
I sat on my bike outside The Coffee Shoppe. The Bookstore was across the street, and the sign above the door mocked me. The desire to say fuck it and leave was so strong I had to pull my key out of the ignition and put it in my pocket so that fucking inanimate object stopped talking to me.
The devil on my shoulder told me I had nothing to apologize for. But the voice of Rachel and Haizley, and now Rose, told me to ignore the bastard.
Leaving my bike out front, I walked up to the counter and ordered a coffee.
“Morning, Cash.”
“Morning, Audrey,” I repeated her greeting and looked around. Shaking my head, I grabbed my balls, figuratively of course, and asked, “Hey, Audrey, does Ryder have a coffee he usually gets?”
“He does. Ellie does too.”
“Can you make one for each of them?”
Audrey gave me a knowing smile and nodded. I stood off to the side and waited. I could still fuck off and ignore this shit, but Rose was in my head and under my skin.
If this thing that was growing between us was going to go anywhere, I owed it to Rachel’s best friend to talk to him. Even if I hated the son of a bitch.
“Here you go.”
Audrey set the drink tray filled with coffees and something else on the counter. When I looked up, before I could ask, she said, “A chocolate milk for Tabby. Chrissy’s in school or I would have given you two.”
“Thanks.”
She winked and walked off to wait on the next customer. Staring at the cardboard tray, I gave myself a silent pep talk. I could do this. I was a fucking Silver Shadow, for Christ’s sake.
Grabbing my peace offering, I trudged across the street. The warm weather ensured the door was left open so I could slip in without being noticed. I wanted to assess Ryder’s mood before I spoke to him.
God, why was this so fucking hard.
“Cash?”
“Hey, Ellie. I brought you a coffee. And a chocolate milk for Tabby.”
Ellie looked at me warily. She slowly moved closer and took the coffee I held out. “Thank you.”
“Is a... is Ryder here?”
She cocked her head to the side and watched me squirm. “He’s in his office. Would you like me to get him?” she asked as she hooked her thumb over her shoulder.
“No,” I said, a little too quickly.
“Is everything ok?”
“Fuck, this is harder than I thought,” I mumbled.
Ellie’s hand on my arm helped to calm my racing heart. “Just talk to him, Cash. He’s hurting as much as you are.”
I nodded. My shoulders rose and fell with the deep inhale and heavy exhale as I steeled myself to face my old lady’s best friend.
Former old lady, I reminded myself.
