My hand slipped to the outside of my leg, close to my hip. There was space there. Smooth skin yet to be marred by my shame. My constant need to feel.
Staring at the blade, I ran my finger over the sharp edge. The thin line of crimson that appeared wasn’t enough. The sting from the water on the open wound wasn’t enough.
It was never enough.
It was only a balm. A temporary reprieve. It didn’t heal. There was no healing the circumstances that led me to that first cut.
I ran down the stairs, a smile on my face. It was my fifteenth birthday. My fourth birthday with Val and the Nyght Nymphs. I was excited to see what they had done this year.
When I reached the bottom of the stairs, everything was quiet. They were hiding, and my smile grew. I just knew that at any minute, they would all jump out and yell surprise.
But as I looked around, I didn’t see any balloons. No streamers. No presents. I searched the house and no one was here.
Where did everyone go?
The front door opened, and Syrena walked in. Her eyes landed on me and guilt covered her features.
“Oh shit, Kytten. I’m sorry. I wanted to be back before you woke up.”
“Where is everyone?” At least someone remembered.
“They found her,” Syrena whispered as she set the grocery bags on the counter.
“Found who?”
“Val’s daughter.”
I swallowed as I stared at Syrena, not really understanding the magnitude of her words.
“Where’s Val?”
“Louisiana.”
“Why?” I asked, confused.
“Didn’t you hear me? They found her daughter.” Syrena didn’t look at me when she spoke. She was putting the groceries away as if it were just a regular day.
Did they forget about my birthday?
Val found her daughter and forgot about me.
“Kytten? Are you ok?”
My eyes snapped to Syrena, and I plastered a smile on my face. “Of course. I’m so happy Val found her daughter.”
That was the first time I lied to one of the women who had become my family. The first time I had pushed my feelings down.
I was happy for Val. Truly, I was. I was glad she found her daughter; I just didn’t want her to forget about me in the process.
“Here, put this in the fridge.” Syrena handed me the glass bottle. When she let go, it slipped through my fingers, crashing to the floor.
“KYTTEN!” Syrena rushed over and pulled me back. “Sit down, honey.” When she grabbed the broom to clean up the mess, I ran back up to my room.
I sat on my bed and pulled the leg of my pajamas up to my knee. There, embedded in my shin, was a small piece of glass. As I silently watched the blood trickle down my leg, a scream tore through my mind.
Chapter Fourteen
Cash
