Page 106 of Just About a Rake


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Darkness shrouded him, and no matter how much of her light pierced through the shadows, the shadows always returned the moment she left. If he were a good man, he’d have done the right thing. He’d have asked for her hand. Taken responsibility. But he was not good. To him, being the better man meant not repeating his father’s mistakes—ensuring he never put himself in a position where he could.

How comedic.

They spoke of marriage as being leg shackled, but if that were truly the case—his leg shackled with hers, in a literal sense—perhaps the threat of the past repeating itself would become null and void.

But he knew better. Marriage didn’t change a man. It only exposed what was already there. And what was inside him wasn’t fit to be bound to someone like her.

She was bright afternoons and warmth, and he was the cold creeping in at dusk, the kind that made people shut their windows and lock their doors. She was the kind of woman who made men believe they could be better—except Dare had spent a lifetime knowing exactly what he was. No amount of fool’s hope could rewrite that truth.

Still, those words echoed in his head.Chaste friendship.

His mouth twisted. No, there was nothing chaste about the way he wanted her. The way he thought of her, even now, with his pulse still hammering from the sheerwantof her.

He dragged a hand through his hair and let his head fall back against the seat. The carriage jolted as it hit a rut, but he barely felt it. He had endured worse disruptions. He had survived worse. And yet, for the first time in his life, he wasn’t entirely certain he would survivethis.

Her.

And the damnable burn clawing at his chest.

After some time, the carriage stopped and Dare sighed. He hated nights at home.Too damn silent.

“Dare, old fellow! What the devil!”

Dare almost slipped stepping from the carriage and glanced back to see Knox and Drake jumping from the driver’s seat of another carriage. A question mark formed on his brow. “Whose vehicle is that?” Had they chased after him?

“Not important,” Drake said.

Enemies, I tell you, enemies.What friends would do this at such a time?

“I’m not in the mood for whatever nonsense you bring with you,” Dare bit out.

“Then you wish to be alone?” Knox’s mocking tone jabbed his ears.

Enemy—and one that read him like a book. Dare sneered and strode to his home, not objecting to their shadows following in his trail. “I don’t want to talk about her.”

“Wouldn’t dream of mentioning her name,” Knox drawled.

“Yes, we are more interested in the monkey,” Drake added.

Dare clenched his fist and whirled on them “What do you want to say about that damn monkey? Say it now. Because the moment I enter that house,” he jabbed a finger at his door, “this night never happened.”

“You weren’t bitten were you?” Knox asked. “If you were, I shall have my physician summoned. Monkeys are vile creatures.”

“No.” He glanced down at his clothing and then at his hands. No imprints of bites anywhere. That monkey had merely given him a fright and flashed his teeth at him. Laughingat him. He had become the mockery of the animal world.

More irony. He had called himself a man of nothing but animal instinct so often over the years that it wouldn’t surprise him ifrealanimals now saw through his shite and were deciding to reject his claim. Honestly.

However, that same instinct had cautioned him to retreat from the theatre. But that wasn’t saying much, since the same instinct had moments prior caused him to push the duke away fromherbefore far too many people who now served as witnesses to what may be the strangest moment of his life.

“You flung a monkey in a duke’s face.”

Dare shot a nasty look at his cousin. “That’s not a question.”

Drake nodded. “Did it feel good?”

Did it? A sudden smile split his face. Bloody hell, he had felt so damn rotten a moment before but the mere memory of the monkey clinging to Calstone’s face... His mood lifted a bit. “I suppose it did.”

“If you are happy, we are happy, old fellow.” Knox peeked at the house. “Will you allow us in now?”