I wasn’t sure my stomach was up foranything stronger, even if the place looked like a cross between a bar and afancy old library.
I hadn’t figured out what to say by thetime we got our bottles of water and sat down, but with Conner around, thatdidn’t seem to be a problem. “So judging by the number of Doms and subs aroundhere that are checking you out, they can’t tell if you’re a Dom or a subeither.”
I had no idea how to respond to that, so Igave a vague shrug that usually made most people happy.
He wasn’t most people.
“This conversation and tour will go muchfaster if you actually talk to me.” The words were sharp, but the tone wassweet, sending mixed signals.
“I realize that.” Our talk had been part ofthe deal to let me join, not that I’d argued against it. I’d actually hoped itwould help.
The owners hadn’t really liked how littleI’d said about myself on the application, but I wasn’t about to make up shitjust to fill in the blanks.
Conner grinned, and it took me a moment torealize that might not have been enough. I took a sip of my water to give myselfa moment to think, but it didn’t help. “I’m not always a sparklingconversationalist. Sorry.”
I’d spent more time working in high schoolthan hanging out, so Laura said I was missing people skills.
Conner waved off my apology. “It’s okay. We’llaim for less small talk and more blunt questions. That work for you?”
Nodding, I felt relieved. “Yes.”
As long as it felt more like a jobinterview and less like a date, I’d be fine. I was great at getting jobs—dates,not so much.
Conner nodded and straightened as he took asip of his water, somehow making it feel like an interview where my prospectiveboss was nearly naked.
Which, oddly enough, would not be theweirdest interview I’d had.
“So on your initial application, youindicated no preference for Dominant or submissive. Has that changed?” Connertook a drink of his water like it was just an everyday conversation for him.
I shook my head, feeling more at ease withthe straightforward question. “I don’t know, but I don’t think so.”
In another situation I’d have felt weirdtalking about it, but he was basically naked in a cock cage, so he didn’t seemlike the type to judge. “My ex-girlfriend and I played around with mydominating her, and while that was good, it was always like something was missing.”
“Something like her gender or somethingelse?” Before I could answer the question, he continued. “I’m trying to figureout how to steer our tour because you’re really blank sexually.”
He winced and charged in again. “Thatdidn’t sound right. I meant more like you don’t flirt, even unconsciously, andI couldn’t tell if you reacted to anyone.”
Conner grinned. “Even me.”
That made me grin faintly as I shrugged.“You’re attractive?”
The fact that it came out as a questionprobably contributed to his laughter, but he seemed to understand it was acompliment. “Thanks.”
Then he gestured around the room with thebottle in his hand. “But usually even confused people have gut reactions thatmake it easy to decide that they belong here and what they need.”
I got another long look from him as Idrank, stalling again, and he continued. “You’re sexy and I bet you’ve got akiller grin when you let it out, but you’re not letting anything escape.”
Shrugging would not help, so I took abreath and tried to picture dominating Natalie. We were just friends now, so itfelt a little weird, but she was my only frame of reference. In my mind, I sawher tied to the bed, and I did my best to let my face show how it’d made mefeel.
Conner slumped back and fanned himself.“Yes, fuck, that was hot.”
Straightening, his grin came back. “Butthat was thinking about domming your ex?”
When I nodded, he searched my face again.“You clearly liked dominating her, so why not look for another female sub oreven a male sub if you’re curious?”
That was a damned good question.
“I don’t know. I’ve always thought aboutmen too, and it feels like something is missing beyond gender.” Dating anotherwoman without having tried to figure myself out felt a bit disingenuous. “I’vehad a lot going on for a while, family stuff, and this is the first time therehasn’t been a fire to put out.”
