“But what about you? You told Austin theother day that you liked pain. Were you just driving him crazy or was that areal response?” His question seemed very casual, but I couldn’t stop my bodyfrom stiffening up.
I didn’t think the topic should besurprising, but the number of subs and people in the lifestyle in general whofound me odd had been startling. As he lifted his head, I nodded. “Realresponse. I like pain. It’s not submissive for me like it is for some people,but the endorphins and chemicals that are produced when my body is experiencingpain is incredible.”
He was quiet for a few seconds before henodded. “Okay, then the dick tattoo thing makes sense.”
I snorted out a laugh. “Yep.”
That had been one of the most incrediblesensations ever.
His head cocked to the side as he continuedto process it. “Why don’t you have more tattoos, then?”
Yep, that was always one of the nextquestions. “It was perfect and everything I thought it would be, but I’m prettysure nothing else will ever be that good. I don’t want to spend my life chasinga high I’ll never find again.”
I didn’t have an addictive personality likepeople might picture, but I could get focused enough that I could see itturning into a problem. So I wasn’t going to start.
“If I ever get another tattoo, it will bebecause it’s something meaningful for me, not because it feels good.” I was notgoing to end up covered head to toe in random things just because it got meoff.
“I can understand that.” He was quiet for afew seconds. I had a feeling he was trying to figure out how to word something.“But I’m assuming you’re fulfilling that need in other ways, then?”
I had to grin. “When the opportunityarises, yes.”
If he could ask something blandly, thenthat’s how I’d answer it.
He snorted, clearly not happy with thatresponse. “I was trying to be polite.”
“Asking questions will never be impolite,teach, just don’t growl at me and demand things.” Like he was getting ready todo now.
Someone needed a reminder that demands madein frustration or anger weren’t going to be allowed in this relationship.“Kneel for me.”
Bradley swallowed hard but started to standwithout commenting. I took his hand in mine as he stood between my legs, thengrabbed a pillow from the couch and placed it on the floor. He didn’t need myhelp guiding him down, but I wanted him to feel my touch as he kneeled for mefor the first time.
The frustration that had been trying towrap itself around him seemed to fade as he settled before me. He was close enoughthat when I closed my legs slightly, they cradled his body. Leaning forwardslightly, I ran my hand over his head, teasing the hair that always seemed tobe a little more out of control than he wanted.
“You look so good like this.” Trailing myfingers down his neck, I circled them back around the side of his head so Icould play with his hair again. “You’re going to look even better naked, butjust like this, casual and simple. It’s perfect.”
His head leaned into my touch and hiseyelids drooped just enough that I could see how good it felt to him. I wasn’tsure if it was my touch or the kneeling or both, but something was pushing theanger out of him. For an omega who could be so beautifully submissive, the restof the time anger seemed to be chasing him like a rabid dog that almost caughthim every time.
We waited like that for several longmoments, just being together, before I spoke again. “I will always answer yourquestions as long as we’re communicating nicely with each other.”
He gave a quiet chuckle. “No demands orasshole behavior.”
I smiled and nodded even though I wasn’tsure he was really focused on anything. “That’s correct. I’m not trying tochange who you are outside of this relationship or how you interact with yourfriends, but here with us, it’s different. We’re different together. Like wetalked about earlier. It’s how we know our relationship is separate fromanything else we have.”
He nodded against my hand. “I’m sorry. Itjust felt weird asking about it for some reason and sarcasm is my defaultstate.”
“You do it very well. I like it when it’snot aimed at me.” I leaned closer and kissed his head. “But try asking meagain.”
That got me a low sigh, but he was stillrelaxed so I knew it was for show. “If the pain thing isn’t submissive for you,how do you get that need fulfilled?”
“A perfectly reasonable question given oursituation.” I chuckled when he huffed but kept his smart-ass comments tohimself.
“I have a few buddies that will flog me orsomething like that when I need it. It’s more like two buddies hanging out thansubmission. I might not be explaining this right.” It’d always sounded odd whenI tried to make anyone else understand.
Bradley tilted his head just enough tofocus on my face. “So no submission, no sex, just the pain to what…clear yourhead?”
I nodded. “Basically. A few of us exploredshit together when we were younger but nothing sexual like what you’d imaginehas happened in years.”
I got another nod from him, but he seemedat ease with my explanation so far, so I continued. “I usually get the urge afew times a year, not necessarily when anything is stressful—it’s just a needthat builds until I know it’s time, and I give a friend a call.”
