Chapter 3
Casey
I was out on a date with Preston!
There was no way to adequately explain to someone how insane it was. My online friends who’d been around since the beginning of my blog might get it, but even someone like Lane wouldn’t understand how crazy it was.
Even a few years ago, I wouldn’t have been ready to meet someone like him. Just last year I’d been too shy to talk to him about anything other than work. But somehow, I hadn’t missed my chance. Yeah, my online friends would be the only people in my life to really get it.
He had my hand in his still.
When he’d first brushed his hand up against mine, I’d thought it had to be an accident. When he did it again, letting his hand caress over mine, I’d almost stopped breathing. He was touching me.
Rationally, I knew I needed to get out more if that almost innocent touch made me hard, but it was the first time he’d crossed the line. He was always so careful, I could never tell if my obsession was just one-sided. Even when he’d started sending me the funny memes and silly videos, I hadn’t been sure what he was thinking.
Friends sent funny videos too. Even my online friends randomly sent me funny stuff, so it didn’t necessarily mean anything. But holding hands…that meant something. He’d even taken my hand around the people at work…his family.
I let myself pretend for a moment that it had been his way of staking claim to me.
The images in my head made my dick even harder, which was awkward considering what I was wearing under my pants. The panties had been just a little way of bolstering my courage and trying to fit in. If I’d realized my afternoon at a photo shoot would end with a date, I’d have probably worn something more…traditional.
Maybe?
Preston hadn’t seemed to mind when I’d said Lane looked pretty—and then there was the way Eli had looked at me when he’d said that Preston would like to see me pretty.
Would he really?
Eli was…Eli, but Lane always made him sound honest to a fault, not like he’d tease someone just to embarrass them. Eli knew how shy I was, and the few times I’d seen him, he hadn’t gone out of his way to make me the center of attention. If anything, he’d let me fade into the background even more.
Today had been…very different. He’d gone out of his way to…well, I hadn’t been able to figure out what he was doing, but it’d been deliberate.
“You seem quieter than usual.” Preston’s tone was carefully neutral, like he was afraid of startling me.
I’d made the decision to try harder to open up to him, so I forced myself not to just play off the question. “I guess I have a lot on my mind. This is…unexpected.”
It was still vague, but I could see Preston smiling out of the corner of my eye, and happiness surged through me. “Unexpected but not unwelcome, right?”
He was so careful, I wasn’t sure how to respond. “Correct.”
Not unwelcome at all.
I just wasn’t sure what he wanted; only a date…something more? As we walked down the street toward the burger place, I had to admit that I probably should have quizzed Lane a bit more about Preston.
What if he thought the panties were fine but didn’t want to date a more submissive guy? I told myself that it would be fine, but there was no way to know. He seemed okay with Eli’s relationship with the photographer, and they were very clearly doing all kinds of stuff, but that didn’t mean he wanted someone like…like me in his life.
Someone who wanted to be controlled.
Someone who wanted to be spanked.
It’d taken me a long time to be able to acknowledge the things I wanted. I wouldn’t push them back in the closet, but what if they were a deal breaker for Preston? How was I even supposed to figure that out? Just ask it?
Hey, Preston, I know you run a lingerie company that’s designed for men so you’re probably fine with me wearing panties, but what do you think about submission and spankings?
Even thinking the words had my stomach turning in circles. Saying it would be out of the question.
“I have to admit. I’m used to asking you about work, so I’m not sure where to take the conversation from here.” The hint of frustration in Preston’s voice made me smile.
I understood where he was coming from, though. “Um, how about I ask you about…the photo shoot? That wasn’t my company’s stuff, so it can’t count as work.”
