Sometimes that was fine, but it had gottento the point where I was tired of being stereotyped.
In college, it hadn’t really mattered whatI’d looked like. Art majors were supposed to be different, and most of myfriends in the English department were so buried in their books and papers thatthey were lost in their own world. I’d gotten some pushback from my professorsearly on, but when they realized I wasn’t just a moron with tattoos, they’dchanged their tune.
It made me wonder what my stalker saw whenhe looked at me.
Did he just notice the tattoos or had heseen past that?
Before I’d started reading on my lunchbreak, I’d gotten more than my fair share of phone numbers from women who werejust looking for a bad boy to have a good time with. Was that what my stalkerwas looking for? Did he just want the fantasy of a badass straight guy?
If he did, he’d be disappointed.
Part of me wanted to say yes and shove itout of my mind. But something about the way his friend had spoken made mequestion it. I liked the idea of finding someone. I wasn’t going to lie aboutthat. I’d been single for a while and had crossed the bridge from content intoloneliness. But that couldn’t be the only reason I found my shy stalker constantlyon my mind.
Grabbing my phone off the table, I made myway over to the living room and started to dial. Staring out the window, Istarted to relax. I loved the way the lights twinkled in the darkness. I’dtried to capture it dozens of times since I’d moved in, but I hadn’t been ableto find the right medium.
As the phone rang, I glanced down at thetime and shrugged. It was almost midnight, but with the time zone differences,I wasn’t worried. Besides, he’d always been a night owl.
When the phone connected, chuckling cameover the line. “Wildman, why don’t you ever call me at a normal time?”
“I am way too old for that nickname.Besides, if anyone was wild, it would’ve been you.”
Gray laughed. “Yeah, maybe. What’s up?”
I scoffed. “Can’t I call you just to chat?”
“Technically, but you never have.”
I had a feeling I’d captured his fullattention. “One of these days I will, and you’re going to have a heart attack.”
“I’m not going to hold my breath for that.Did you get the news on that contract already?” Gray had always been one of thefew people who never even blinked when they’d found out what I wanted to do. Hejust shrugged and wished me luck. At first, I thought his nonchalance wasbecause he wanted the room I was renting out. But no, that was just who he was.
“Not yet. It will be another week or twobefore I hear back. I just wish they’d have taken my suggestion. I still thinkthe book would look better in color.” I wasn’t sure if the pen and ink drawingshad been the publisher’s idea or the author’s, but after reading the book, I’dpictured the scenes in watercolors. “I’m not even sure if I want the commissionanymore. I have a feeling that we’re not going to see eye to eye about any ofit.”
Getting to the point where I could turndown a job was wonderful. Readers didn’t always know the names of theillustrators, but I’d built up a bit of a reputation in the publishing industryand could now pick and choose which projects I wanted to work on. It’d helpedthat I could live on what I made from the tattoo parlor, but it had been almosta year since I’d had to touch that income. Being able to live off my art wassomething I’d never imagined would be possible.
“So why are you calling me instead of workingon something else? You usually ignore any phone calls this late at night.” Graywas right. I should have been so focused on work I didn’t even hear the phonering, much less wander off and make a phone call.
“When we were roommates, you said that straightguys got blow jobs from other men all the time, and that it didn’t meananything. Right?” Evidently, Gray hadn’t been expecting anything like thatbecause he started to choke and cough.
By the time he’d gotten a hold of himself,I’d begun to regret the phone call. Shaking my head, I started to end the call.“Listen, I’ll just—”
Gray jumped back in as soon as he could breathe.“No, you just startled me. I don’t remember the exact conversation, but in mydefense I was drunk, and you were hot. But yes, straight guys get curious. Itdoesn’t make them gay or bi.”
“Then what does?”
Gray sighed. “Just once I’d like you tocall for absolutely no reason and just ask about the weather.”
“You live in Seattle. I know what theweather is.”
“Not the point.” I could almost hear himgathering his thoughts and pictured him shaking his head like a dog trying toget water off its fur. “Okay, I guess it changes when there are emotionsinvolved or when you can see yourself dating somebody. Not just getting drunkand letting them suck your dick, but actually having dinner with him and givinghim a kiss good night. I’m not sure if I’m explaining it right. Like, when thereare emotions involved, not just getting off.”
“That makes sense.” Running things throughin my head, I wasn’t sure if that answered my question, though.
Or maybe it did, and I just wasn’t ready tohear it.
I must have been quiet for too long becauseGray spoke up again. “You can’t leave me hanging like that. What did you do? Ormaybe a better question is, who did you do something with?” I could tell he wastrying not to laugh, but I didn’t take offense.
“I haven’t done anything yet. The guydidn’t even know I was aware of what was going on.”
