I just wish she hadn’t chosen them.
“What’s the matter?” Pandora runs a hand along my jaw and tilts my face in her direction. “I’m not dumping you, River. You were mine first.”
I jerk away from her touch even though I want to lean into it. “Dumping me implies that we’re together, and we’re not. You know why I’m here, and you know what I want. We’re only taking a detour.”
I say the words, but I’m not sure that even I believe them anymore. I want to think that I’ll destroy her as soon as we uncover Rachel’s killer, but…
I’m not so sure.
Pandora smiles at me, that same breathtaking smile that made young me fall for her in the first place. It calls to me, makes me want to follow along with all of her whims.
Whenever I’m with Pandora, I feel thrills I thought impossible.
But as soon as the illusion shatters, I’m left only with broken pieces.
So why can I never pull away entirely?
“Oh, River,” she says. “Of course we’re together. I’m not even fucking anyone else except Blaze and Asch. I looked at that smoking hot guy, Reaper, and didn’t even feel tempted. That means something.”
No one else has ever kept her interest before. She went from one guy to the next in high school, and I’d never gotten jealous because she hadn’t kept them long enough for that feeling to form.
But it’s different with Blaze and Asch, and I don’t like it.
“I’m not interested in being one of three men for you, Pandora,” I tell her.
Pandora’s brows furrow. “You kind of have to. And you like Blaze and Asch, right? You’re frat brothers now.” She leans in to kiss my cheek. “You’re being silly, River. Four is the exact right number of people.”
“Like is a very strong word,” I tell her, letting her lips brush my cheek even though I want to pull away again. I tolerate Blaze and Asch, and that’s partially because I have to if I’m going to get anywhere in the search for Rachel’s killer.
Because that’s what everything is about, what everything is contingent upon.
I don’t know what will happen once we’ve found him, but I know that this house of cards is only waiting for the slightest breeze before it comes tumbling down.
“Anyway. If you don’t want to inspect my naked body, do you want to help me study?” Pandora holds up her tablet. “Intro toBiochem is killing me. I really don’t care about the structures of chemicals.”
“Neither do I,” I tell her. I don’t want to be around her, but at the same time, I feel like I’m a moth drawn to her flame, a planet in her orbit, and I can’t seem to stay away. “Your roommate is a fucking bitch, you know that? Or I’d say we could go there.”
“Eh, she’s okay.” Pandora rests herself against me and sets her tablet on her lap. “She’s got a boyfriend now, I think, so she’s loosened up a bit. Not that I think they’re fucking, but if she found a guy who’s as much a prude as she is, I guess it’s a match made in heaven.”
“Surprises me that there are any prudes left at this point,” I remark, watching Pandora and wishing I could shake some sense into her. Blaze and Asch aren’t good for her, and Zayden’s crusade against her is bound to cause problems.
Not that I think Blaze is going to take Zayden’s rules into consideration for much.
Does Pandora even know she’s banned from the Kappa Alpha house?
“Did Blaze and Asch mention…” I trail off, not sure how to say it delicately enough.
“Mention what? How hot I am? How into you they are? The current weather?”
I glance down at her tablet, watching her tap through the pages of the textbook, instead of looking at her. “You know Zayden isn’t thrilled with you, right?” I settle on.
Pandora lets out a small laugh. “Who cares what Zayden thinks? He’s like an annoying yappy dog, begging for treats from Blaze.”
“He’s technically in charge of the frat,” I point out.
And he’s going to be pissed when he finds out I’m not only hanging out with Pandora, but that we’re this close, too.
Physically, at least.