The words hit me like a physical blow. I want to believe them so badly it hurts. My chest aches like something’s breaking open inside.
“You don’t mean that.”
“I do.”
“You’ll change your mind. When the show ends and you go back to your real life, you’ll realize this was just…”
“Just what?”
“A distraction.”
He stares at me for a long moment, his thumbs stroking across my cheekbones. I’m trembling and I hope he can’t feel it.
“Is that what you think this is? A distraction?”
I can’t answer. Because if I say yes, I’m lying. And if I say no, I’m admitting something I’m not ready to admit.
“Wren.” His voice is softer now, almost pleading. “Talk to me.”
“I can’t.”
“Why?”
“Because I’m falling for you and it’s terrifying and I don’t know how to stop.”
The confession tumbles out before I can stop it. Ryan goes very still, his hands still framing my face.
“Don’t stop,” he whispers.
“What?”
“Don’t stop falling for me. Because I’m already gone.”
And then he’s kissing me, desperate and hungry like he’s been starving for days. My body answers before my mind can form a protest. There’s no world in which this is smart. But I don’t care. Not when he kisses me like this. Like I’m the only thing he’s ever wanted and the only thing he’s ever lost.
I should push him away. I should remember where we are and what we’re risking. But his mouth is hot and demanding and I melt into him like I always do.
He presses me back against the shelves, his body caging me in. I can feel every hard line of him, the way his chest rises and falls with his breathing. My phone falls from my hand, the light spinning crazily before settling on the floor, casting strange angular shadows across the ceiling.
“I missed you today,” he murmurs against my lips.
“You saw me all day.”
“Not like this. Not touching you.”
His hands slide down my sides, skimming over my ribs, my waist, coming to rest on my hips. I’m wearing a simple black dress and tights, nothing fancy, but the way he looks at me makes me feel like I’m dressed in silk and diamonds.
“We can’t do this here,” I whisper even as I arch into his touch.
“I know.”
But neither of us moves to stop it. If anything, he kisses me harder, one hand tangling in my hair while the other slides around to the small of my back, pulling me flush against him.
I can feel how much he wants me, hard and insistent against my stomach. It sends heat spiraling through my core and I make a soft sound that gets swallowed by his mouth.
“Fuck, Chirp,” he breathes. “The sounds you make.”
He trails kisses down my throat, finding that spot just below my ear that makes me gasp. His stubble scrapes against my skin and I shiver, my hands fisting in his shirt.