I looked up from sipping my coffee as he slid the steaming eggs in front of me. “Don’t know why we would. You spent maybe five minutes with my family before taking my sister to London with you. And that was after knocking her up and disappearing. But you did marry her in the end, I guess.”
It was hard not to sound bitter. In general, I was happy for Frankie. These days, she was living a fairy tale that most people would kill for. Rich husband, baby on the way. She was even planning to go back to school in the fall to study all those stuffy books she loved so much.
She had a purpose. She had everything.
And I had absolutely nothing.
“Yeah, well. That’s probably my fault,” Xavier said while getting to work on the next omelet. “I’ve never been good with families.”
I crinkled my brow. “How does that work?”
He sighed. “What’s Ces told you about my life? How I grew up?”
“That you lived in South London, became a big-shot chef, and then found out you were going to become a duke later.” I gave him a pointed look before biting into my biscuit. “And didn’t tell her that last part until it was way too late.”
The big man had the decency to look ashamed. “Yeah, well. That’s more because I didn’t quite believe it myself. Not for a long time.” He sighed. “I was raised in a two-bedroom flat by a single mum. She died when I was sixteen. After that, my dad shoved me into boarding school just to be done with me. I might have been a duke’s son, but everyone said I was a bastard until I was nineteen.” He searched my face for recognition. “Bastards can’t inherit titles in England. They found my parents’ marriage certificate, which made me legitimate, but I could never shake that feeling of being worthless. Just like everyone said.”
I scowled at my plate. “If this is a pep talk, it’s a terrible one.”
Xavier flipped the eggs onto another plate, presumably for Marie, then came to sit next to me at the table. He was a big man. Taller even than Nathan, but not as broad. All sharp angles in his cheekbones and steely blue eyes lacking the warmth and solidness in his body that Nathan had.
God, I missed Nathan. More than once over the past two months, I’d rolled over half asleep to snuggle him, only to find my sister’s bony body shoving me away. It made me want to cry every time.
“It wasn’t until I met your sister that things really changed for me. For the first time, I found someone who saw me for who I really was. More than a label or a title.”
I peered up at him. “And your point is?”
“This bloke of yours. He’s been calling.”
I perked. “He has?”
Xavier nodded. “Leaves messages with my assistant almost every day. I’m not supposed to say anything, but I wondered…everyone’s got their boxes, see? The ones we can’t seem to escape until someone else sees us differently. I wondered if maybe he did that for you. Like Francesca does for me.”
I looked at him for a long time.
“It wouldn’t matter if he did,” I said. “I crossed a line. There’s no coming back from that now.”
“You sure about that?”
I nodded. “If there’s one thing this whole disaster has taught me, it’s that it’s time to grow up. Learn to be realistic and stop wanting to be things I’ll just never be.”
Xavier worried his jaw a moment, then nodded. “Well, in that case, I think Marie’s wrong about you staying here with her. You need to move around, do something. Pull yourself out of your misery.”
“Gee, thanks,” I spat. “I’ll be sure to get on that.”
But Xavier wasn’t put off by my sour attitude. “I’ve got six restaurants in London alone and an extra bedroom in our flat. I can get you work, and on your days off, you can help Ces with the babes. You got a better plan?”
I stared at my still-full plate. It was a good offer for someone like me. Someone with no outlook to speak of. No future.
Still, I couldn’t bring myself to say yes. Just like I couldn’t bring myself to do anything else these days.
“I—I’ll have to think about it,” I said finally.
Xavier peered at me a bit more, but didn’t seem interested in pushing.
“All right,” he replied, getting back up to finish lunch. “I’m staying at the George V until Thursday. Let me know by then, and you can fly to London with me.” He looked over his shoulder. “But the next time your fella calls, you want me to take it?”
I had to think about that too.
