The welcome bite of crisp December air hit me when I stepped outside. Continuing to avoid filming people, I captured both a wide shot and a close-up of the hospital signage. Then I panned across the roof and the icicle lights circling the ambulance bay. It would make useful b-roll.
A gust of wind whipped against my cheeks, and I tugged my beanie over my ears to make sure it didn’t fly away. But even with the chill, I felt more settled than I had in a while. I was making videos again. Will and I were finally ready to clear the air. I almost laughed. I wouldn’t, not with him lying in a hospital bed. But some sort of switch had flipped during this long night.
The past few years, Bren had harped on my lack of a personal life. She’d told me constantly I needed to “unclench.” I hadn’t understood.
But now, I knew what my best friend had been driving at. Because I could feel myself opening up. To new possibilities.
Opening up, not unraveling.
Chapter seventeen
Will
I’d felt okay at the hospital. Okay during check-out. Okay during the long ride to James and Marley’s house. I’d even felt okay during the walk from Maureen’s car to the guest room, though that short distance had seemed like a marathon.
But now that I was here, propped up against a million pillows, I was too dizzy to even lift a water glass to my mouth. I felt wrecked. The medications were wearing off.
Dr. McNulty cautioned me this would happen. She’d even offered me an extra few days of painkillers to get through the worst of it. But I declined. I’d faced the nausea, vertigo, and dizziness that came from a concussion before. In my mind, thepain was better than the feeling of helplessness that came with being totally out of it.
I felt a straw touch my lips. “Just a few sips at a time today,” Marley said, leaning down next to the bed. “Doctor’s orders.”
“I know the drill. Not my first rodeo,” I said, hearing James’s intake of breath across the room. I knew the doctors had given them the barest details of my medical history, and I needed to fill in the blanks. But not now. What I needed to do now was concentrate on not throwing up.
“Let Marley Mother Hen you, Will. She’ll be unbearable otherwise,” Maureen spoke up from the doorway.
My cheek rose slightly as I released the straw. Speaking slowly and concisely—damn, I hated the side effect of having to search for my words—I asked, “Are you planning on huh-huh-huh…”Fuck!“Hovering…for the next five days?” I’d been diagnosed with a relatively mild concussion, but they were being extra careful because of my history. The doctors planned to do another scan on Friday to compare it to the one they’d taken after my fall to make sure they hadn’t missed anything.
“Of course.” This time, it was James speaking unapologetically. “We’re going to Florence Nightingale your ass so hard you won’t know what hit you.”
I smiled, wanting to laugh or at least say thanks, but I couldn’t because if I opened my mouth, vomit might come out.
James’s phone buzzed, and he stepped out to take the call.
“Maybe we should leave so Will can rest,” Maureen said to Marley. “He might be more up for talking after a nap.”
I dipped my chin as best I could and hoped she knew I was grateful. I had so much to say. But my forehead was throbbing. Full-blown metal concert going on in there. Maybe I should have taken the prescription for the harder drugs? No. I needed clarity for these conversations.
I wanted to talk with all three of them about my accident so they could understand why the doctors were being cautious. And then, of course, Maureen and I hadthingsto discuss. She said she was ready to hear what happened five years ago, and I wanted to tell her before she changed her mind.
My thoughts grew muddled. Vaguely, I heard commotion coming from the kitchen and the living room. The distinct sound of James lumbering around his bedroom. Marley and Maureen speaking rapidly. Even the dogs were barking. Something was happening. But my stupid head. I tried to fight it. Tried to concentrate on the raised voices and the sound of James’s car tearing out of the driveway, the crack of tires on the icy road. But sleep pulled me under.
When I woke up, I could hear Marleyand Maureen speaking quietly somewhere outside the bedroom. My foggy brain couldn’t distinguish between their voices, and I only picked up snippets of the conversation.
“…I’ll just stay… Whose responsibility is it then… James said it’s bad… Heard from Dr. McNulty… We should wait and ask Will… About three hours… You know you’ll have to tell me eventually… Not sure about the timing…”
They walked farther away, and I couldn’t hear any more. Not that it mattered, because my awareness faded again.
When I woke a second time, Maureen was in my room, perched against the dresser and looking at a tablet. She had it set in dark mode with the screen faced away from me, so there wasn’t much light, but she still powered it off quickly once she noticed my eyes were open.
“Hey,” I rasped.
“Will.” She breathed out and smiled. “I was wondering if I should wake you again. We’ve been doing it every two hours like the doctor said to, but you keep going right back under.”
With some difficulty, I tilted my head toward the window to see the sun had set. “What… time?”
“Just past seven. You were awake for a few minutes when we brought you home from the hospital, but you’ve been sleeping ever since.”
I felt so groggy. I tried to lift myself, but the pain in my head had me immediately falling back against the pillow.
