I reached down to tug my own bottoms off, but unlike him, I left my underwear on, opening my thighs in invitation. “You take them off.”
James put one knee on the couch and I felt the old springs groan under his weight. It thrilled me how imposing he was. How he could tower above me and yet his every action teemed with care. He crawled to me and straddled my hips, hooking his thumbs into the sides of my panties.
He pulled the scrap of red silk down in one motion. His eyes raked hungrily over my body. The heat in his inspection acted like a stun gun, paralyzing me as I reveled in his perusal.
James leaned down to place soft kisses on my thighs, inching toward my core. His words hushed as he asked, “Can I put my mouth on you?”
I wanted his mouth on me. Eventually. But right now, there was something else I wanted more.
“Actually, James—I’m burning to have you inside me. I need it. As soon as possible.”
His breath hitched as he nodded. He leaned down to press one kiss between my thighs before sitting back on his haunches to sheath himself in the condom.
He stretched out over me, one knee holding his body aloft, as his fingers dipped down beneath my belly to explore between my folds. My clit stood at rigid attention, my preparedness for his entry more than evident.
“You’re ready for me?” he asked, as though astonished I’d gotten aroused so quickly.
“I’ve never wanted anyone as much as I want you,” I said truthfully, reaching my hands behind my knees to hold my legs apart and open for him. “Please.”
“Goddamn,” he breathed out, positioning the tip of his erection at my center. He pushed inside me in one sure stroke and we both cried out at the fullness.
Before I could even process the intense pleasure, his mouth was back on mine. He kissed me repeatedly, shifting to press his lips along my face and jaw, as he rocked his body into mine, murmuring soft words I was too pleasure-drunk to hear.
A few minutes passed as I felt my orgasm building. I hooked my feet around his waist, digging my heels into his round backside as I urged him to move faster. Harder. He lifted a hand from the mattress to reach between us, rubbing the nub of my clit frantically with his index and middle fingers. I came almost without knowing it was happening. One moment we were striving together and the next I was bursting into flames around his thickness, digging my fingers into his back as I surrendered to the waves of the most intense orgasm I’d ever experienced.
“James—” I cried out, legs shaking as I came down from the high.
His breaths became frantic pants as he rutted into me, snapping his hips rhythmically as he chased his own release. Finally, he came with a muffled cry, repeating my name over and over again into my neck before collapsing on top of me.
He paused a moment before getting up to dispose of the condom in the bathroom, coming back to the bed hurriedly before pulling me into his arms and throwing the blankets over both of us.
“Thank you,” he whispered so softly I wasn’t sure if he’d meant me to hear it.
“I’m glad that happened,” I said.
“Me too.” He kissed the crown of my head lightly. “And I know there’s still a lot up in the air, especially if Coleman Creek cuts me out of the budget. But I realized tonight how I felt about you. What I want. I couldn’t wait anymore.”
“Baby?”
“God, I love that. Um hmm?”
“What we said before still stands. Even if we changed the game a bit. We don’t have to figure it all out tonight.”
I snuggled into his arms, letting the blackness steal the worries away. He’d mentioned the teaching job at the school, but there was so much more at play here.
No matter how good it felt in the moment, I couldn’t escape the feeling that James and I were very different people. Cool versus basic, interesting versus mid. I believed him when he said he needed me. James was the most mercurial person I’d ever met, a gifted actor. I was the opposite. Steady, straightforward. We helped balance one another.
But as perfectly as I fit with James now, I knew how deceptive that feeling could be. Because I’d felt it before, with Kasen. I’d thought we fit together just right. But what I’d learned is that even perfection doesn’t equal permanence.
Chapter fourteen
James
IwokeupwithMarley in my arms, cupping her firm breasts over the top of her thermals. She’d insisted on getting dressed in the early morning hours, reasoning that my parents might come to the basement for a laundry emergency. It amused me I’d never once snuck around with a girl in high school, but the experience of having sex in my parents’ basement still felt disconcerting as a grown man.
Marley’s even breaths showed deep slumber, but even though I’d barely slept, I couldn’t stay in bed any longer. My body thrummed with energy. Questions and possibilities.
I tiptoed up the stairs and found my dad sitting at the kitchen table, brow furrowed over the crossword inThe New York Times. I had fond memories of working theSeattle Post-Intelligencercrossword with him as a child, before that paper folded. Since I’d been sixteen, my annual Christmas present to my parents was a subscription to theTimes.
