“Little shits,” Chris snarled.
His mom attempted diplomacy. “We are so sad that we couldn’t help you more in high school, sweetheart. Your dad and I love you so much. And we would have been proud of you no matter what happened tonight. But it’s nice to hear that you got the best of those—”
“Little shits,” James’s dad offered again.
“Yes dear, those little shits.”
I laughed out loud as Deanna grinned at me.
James smoothed circles on my lower back as the four of us sat at the small breakfast table. We drank decaf and ate freshly baked sugar cookies—the perfect way to celebrate an evening that felt like Christmas morning.
Chris and Deanna had been friendly yesterday. But the look they’d given me when James and I eventually said our goodnights and headed downstairs had been downright admiring.
They think I love their son.
I cared deeply for James, had been fascinated by him since the beginning, but how had it gotten so intense so quickly?He said I’d made a real difference in his life. It was ironic that in helping James not to be afraid to face his past, I’d become the one who was scared…of falling too hard, too fast.
No matter how much I liked him, I couldn’t help that nagging feeling that James wasn’t for me. That our relationship—whatever it was—was fleeting. The thought of being with him exhilarated me, while at the same time, I was terrified of getting hurt.
But as he took my hand in his to lead me down to the basement, those doubts quieted.
At least for the moment.
After putting onour pajamas, James and I collapsed into bed and immediately assumed yesterday’s position—him as the big spoon curled behind me. I fell into a dreamless sleep almost as soon as I hit the mattress, his warm breath against my neck.
I woke up in the middle of the night to find the blankets pushed down below our waists. Cool December air penetrated the cave-like space of the basement, but James’s body, pressed to mine, provided all the heat I required. His insistent fingers dancing along my torso woke me gently.
Dazed, I roused slowly as his hand traveled a path down my arm. The room remained dark and silent, offering no direction. A glance at the old-fashioned clock radio informed me of the time. Just after two o’clock.
“Marley?” James whispered into the crown of my hair.
“Umph,” I mumbled, still waking up.
“I can’t sleep,” he murmured, speaking into my neck. The vibrations from his voice crawled across my skin. “I’ve been awake for hours. Thinking. I couldn’t wait until the sun came up to tell you again. The reunion. Everything you did. You mean so much to me.”
“Thank you,” I replied sleepily, half convinced I was still dreaming.
His breathing grew labored. I sensed the tension coiled in his body as his hand clenched into a fist next to my wrist.
“I want—” He exhaled huskily, practically groaning. I came fully awake at the sound, the evidence of his desire stabbing into my hip. Still, when the hesitant touch of his lips to the exposed flesh beneath my ear finally came, it shocked me. “Is this okay?” he whispered, pressing one kiss and then another into the sensitive skin.
I held my breath for a silent beat. Wanting James scared me.
But I still wanted him.
I shuddered, breathing out a “yes” in the darkness.
Yes. For however long it lasts.
Even with permission, his movements remained tentative at first. He unclasped his hand slowly and ran it up and down my arm again, then brought it around my belly to pull us close. I felt the firm press of his erection on my backside, and I arched and pushed against him, wordlessly asking for more. He pulled my back against his chest as his hand continued its exploration up my midsection, underneath my thermal as he reached further to lay a rough palm against my breasts. I hadn’t bothered with a bra for sleeping, so his touch had my nipples hardening instantly. I writhed torturously, and his lips against my neck grew more urgent, his mouth moving along my nape to place an intense, bruising kiss at the top of my shoulder.
“Want you,” I said distinctly, words echoing throughout the room. I lifted my arms, signaling James to pull my top off. He did so quickly, removing his own undershirt at the same time.
I rolled over to face him, barely able to make out his shape in the darkness as we both lay on our sides. I leaned in toward him as he did the same.
And then James and I were kissing.
An indescribable wellspring of emotion lit up inside my chest. Like I had been waiting my entire life to feel this sense of rightness, of being cherished fully. As James’s soft lips explored mine and his tongue made a confident foray into my mouth, the impression of everything being in its proper place for the first time ever flooded me.
