"I already told you," he said. "I don't joke."
Suddenly, I heard the squeal of tires and the roar of an engine. An exotic-looking sports car – the same one I'd seen earlier – roared into the turnaround and skidded to a stop.
"See?" Jake said.
In front of us, twenty-something guy with sandy-colored hair jumped out of the driver's seat. He used the keyless remote to pop the trunk. Jake strode toward the trunk and tossed the giant suitcase into it. I followed suit, tossing in my smaller case and stepping out of the way. Jake slammed the trunk shut and strode around to the driver's side.
As I watched, the other guy dove past Jake and crawled into the tiny backseat, leaving Jake to claim the driver's spot. Not knowing what else to do, I dashed to the passenger's side door, flung it open, and dove inside. I slammed the door just in time to see Maddie bolt out of the building, still mostly naked, with Julian on her heels.
Frantically, I looked to Jake. He held out his hand toward the guy in the back seat. "Keys," Jake said.
No keys appeared. My heart racing, I turned toward the back. The guy was digging around in his front pants pocket. I glanced out my car window, only to get a full-frontal of Maddie as she launched her nearly naked body against the passenger side window.
Hurling a stream of obscenities, Maddie reached up to smack the window with both palms.
Desperately, I whirled again toward the back seat. The stranger was staring, dumbstruck, at Maddie's naked breasts, squashed up against the glass.
"Keys!" I yelled.
The guy jerked back and gave a quick shake of his head. Finally, he yanked the keys from his pants pocket and tossed them to Jake, who caught them with one hand and turned to start the engine. With a soft chuckle, Jake shifted the car into gear and squealed out of the lot.
Looking out the back window, I saw Maddie and Julian, standing in the pitted parking lot, each flipping us the double-bird. Other tenants were streaming from the front doors – some looking at our car, and more looking at Maddie, who still hadn't tied the sash of her robe.
Modesty aside, wasn't she freezing? An unwelcome image snapped into my brain. Yes. Shehadbeen freezing, if her nipples had been any kind of indicator. Groaning, I turned around and sank back in my seat.
The guy in the back spoke. "Oh man, that was just gross."
What a liar. I'd seen the look on his face. He hadn't been grossed out. He'd been mesmerized. "Yup," I said. "Utterly disgusting."
"You got that right," he said. "Total loogie."
"What?" I glanced at the passenger's side window. Sure enough, something wet and slimy was dripping down the glass.
Somehow, that was the final straw. I whirled toward Jake, who was still shirtless in the driver's seat. He was navigating city traffic with one eye on the road, and the other eye on the rearview mirror.
"What the hell!" I yelled.
"Hey, she wasyourroommate."
"Oh come on," I said. "That wasn't Maddie's fault. It was yours."
His eyebrows rose. "So, you're saying there's a problem?"
"You could say that." There were so many problems, I didn't know where to begin. I had no job. I had no place to live. I had no money. I gave Jake a withering look. And once I killed him, I had no place to bury the body.
"Some day," Jake said, "you'll thank me."
"Yeah, right." More likely, I'd be digging a Jake-sized hole in someone's cellar. I glanced out the car window and counted to ten. And then, I counted again. Finally, taking a long, deep breath, I made myself ask, "So where are we going, exactly?"
"My place."
Sports car or not, visions of a slumlord's dream skittered across my brain. I turned to the stranger in the back. "Do you know where he lives?"
"Sure," the guy said. "Everyoneknows where Jake lives."
"Well, I don't."
"No shit?" the guy said. "You been living under a rock or something?"
