I followed them blindly through a hallway and two sets of doors. Then, the doctor stepped in front of me. He placed his hand on my chest and spoke softly. “Iosif, you can’t go any further. I will save her and let you know when she has been moved.”
I nodded, feeling my heart being ripped from my chest. Tears rolled down my face as I felt Avgust’s hand on my shoulder. “Come, brother,” he huffed over my shoulder. “Come sit with us.”
I walked with him to the waiting room, but I couldn’t sit down. I paced and waited. After what felt like an eternity, my legs started burning. I sat in the corner, leaning back against the wall.
Closing my eyes was a bad idea. The shooting played over and over like a reel on repeat. I sat up, opening my eyes. “Fuck,” mumbled. Shifting, I placed my elbows on my knees and lowered my head between my hands.
I was struggling to clear my thoughts and keep my anger contained. I didn’t notice the feet before me until Avgust placed a hand on my back and spoke. “It’s going to be okay.”
Glancing up, our eyes met. I could see he was worried about me. I sat back as he took the seat next to me. I didn’t feellike talking, but I would listen if he wanted to talk. “We have handled everything.”
His voice sounded far away, even though he sat right beside me. I wasn’t sure if it was because he was keeping his voice low or because my mind was still struggling to come to grips with what went down.
Avgust leaned in closer as he continued. “The men have been rounded up and will be dealt with accordingly. It’s only Kolya. But I can assure you he is shaken, shocked to the core, and most likely being consumed by his guilt.”
He sat back, breathing in deeply. “Brother,” he said. “What do you want us to do with him? We can drop him for the cops, or deal with it internally.”
I tried to formulate honest thoughts. The way I felt, I didn’t give a fuck what happened to him. I only wanted Clara to live, to return to me. The need for her to make it was overwhelming. But deep down inside, I knew she would disapprove if we took care of him our way.
Glancing at Avgust, I spoke in a soft tone. “Let him go for now. It’s not like he is going to run. He won’t stray far from her. If she doesn’t make it…”
Avgust nodded. He knew what I meant without me having to say it. My heart was bleeding, and if Carla died, Kolya would be bleeding. Avgust got up and left. I watched as he walked out the door and disappeared into the night.
It wasn’t long after that Kolya entered the waiting room. He sat in the opposite corner. Zhenya also came in. She stopped, looked at Kolya, and then came to sit with me. She had brought me a strong cup of coffee as she knew my blood would be boiling. She knew me better than any of our other siblings. I knew shewas also upset about everything, but this wasn’t the time or place.
“Thank you,” I said, taking the cup from her. I had barely taken two sips when the doctor entered.
I got up and met him halfway across the room. I noticed Kolya also getting up and coming closer, but he stopped a couple of feet away. “How is she, doc?” I asked before he could even get a word out.
He smiled as he spoke. “She’s going to make it. Did you know she’s with child?”
“What?” Kolya and I asked simultaneously. We briefly glanced at each other and concentrated on what the doctor was saying.
“Yes,” he added, grinning. “We would like to keep her a couple of days and observe her and the baby. Keep in mind, she lost a lot of blood. Even though she is out of danger, the baby might not be.”
The doctor paused, he looked at Kolya and then back at me as he spoke again. “We’re doing all we can to ensure both of them make it.”
I felt my heart ripping to pieces as his words sank in. An indescribable pain replaced the grief I felt. I didn’t even know she was pregnant, and now there was a chance that our child might not make it.
Zhenya pulled me into a tight hug. “It’s going to be okay,” she whispered.
I hugged her back briefly and then started pacing again. My nerves were shot. I was clenching and releasing my fists as I moved. Not long after the doctor’s visit, a nurse came in. “Mr. Chernykh?” she said, glancing around the room.
“Yes, that’s me,” I replied, rushing over.
“You can come with me,” she added as she turned and headed down the corridor. I followed her closely, basically walking on her heels. “Here you go,” she said, opening a room door.
Inside lay Clara. She looked so peaceful and calm. I was slightly relieved just by seeing her. I pulled up the chair to the side of the bed. Sitting down, I carefully took her hand as a tear rolled down my cheek.
“Both mother and baby are stable for the time being. You can stay here with her. The doctor will be back to check on them later,” the nurse said before leaving.
I kissed her hand and lay my head down on the side of the bed. I was tired and closed my eyes just for a second.
I heard Kolya's voice in the early morning hours. He was talking to Avgust, who had returned to sit with me. I was vaguely aware that the doctor had also checked in, but I was too tired to be fully aware.
The search, the strain, and worry had depleted me. When I woke up, Avgust informed me that they had to place Clara in a medical coma. It would only be for a day or so to give the baby a chance of recovering fully from the shock.
Zhenya came later and asked me to go home; she would sit with Clara until I got back. But I couldn’t make myself go anywhere. I refused as I wanted to be with her no matter what. I would never again leave her side.
