“What did you do for your last birthday?” Scarlet asked.
I picked up my glass, bringing it to my lips. “Nothing, really.”
That made Lacey gasp. “What? Why not? Didn’t your friends throw you a party?”
“They would have, if they knew when my birthday was.” Shira had asked me more than once, but I’d told her I was eternal—I didn’t age. She hadn’t appreciated that answer. “I don’t really do birthdays.”
I could almost hear Ben scoffing. “Like you don’t do kids? Come on, Buzz. Everyone’s subject to the ravages of time and cute children.”
“Why not?” Lacey cried. “Birthdays are amazing. You get to be a princess if you want to! Everyone’s nice to you ’cause they have to be. You can have cakeandice cream. It’s the closest to magic you can get without having special powers.”
“I’m so happy birthdays have always been like that for you, darling.” I put my glass down and dabbed my mouth with my napkin. “When I was little, my mom was busy. She didn’t have time to make things magic for me, and we didn’t have extra money for cake and presents. So I’ve just never been into celebrating.”
I kept my explanation as gentle and sanitized as I could. Tony’s deep frown said he understood more than I’d let on, and I glanced at Tore. He was staring into the distance, fidgeting with his ring, stone-faced. Disinterested.
“That sucks,” Lacey declared. “Our mom always made our birthdays a big deal.”
Scarlet nodded. “She made everything a big deal. We didn’t have to wait until our birthdays to celebrate, you know? We had dance parties just for finishing a really good book.”
“Mommy took me to the library whenever I wanted,” Talon added.
Lacey cupped her hands around her mouth. “That’s a party for Tally.”
He scrunched his nose. “I don’t like cake, but I do like ice cream. And books. I love books.”
“I do too,” I agreed. “I wish I’d known your mom. She sounds like my kind of lady. Do you think she would have approved of this party?”
All the kids agreed their mother would have loved my party, and that made me happy. I didn’t have a burning need to celebrate my birthday, but it warmed me to the bone to be the excuse for them to channel her. They got to practice what she’d taught them, keeping her alive and close to them.
Thatwas why I’d show up to all the celebrations they threw.
If I had to, I would sit through Tore’s indifference. Eventually, it wouldn’t feel like this. One day, I wouldn’t mind how easily he’d accepted we were over.
With time, I’d forget we were ever a thing.
With time, the ache would fade, and he’d become a story I used to tell.
Chapter Thirty-eight
Salvatore
Istood,myhandsbraced on the counter, staring down at the cutting board I’d already wiped three times, yet still had crumbs. Scarlet had left a streak of marinara near the faucet. Talon’s silver tray sat abandoned on the counter. The kind of chaos that didn’t bother me as much as it normally would have.
I had other things on my mind.
Everyone was in the living room, the kids shrieking with laughter as my father showed Scarlet some old dance moves of his. Bea’s voice threaded through it all, blending so well, it was like she’d always been there.
I was supposed to stay away.
I’d promised her that.
We were still deep in Antarctica with no signs of leaving. Her boundary had been clear, and I’d done my level best to abide by it.
Then she walked through the door.
The sight of her in my home would’ve been enough to undo me, but it hadn’t stopped there. When the kids had put the plastic crown on her head, her eyes had filled with tears. She’d played along when Talonhad switched into butler mode. And her damn shirt had kept slipping off her shoulder like gravity was conspiring against me.
I gripped the edge of the counter harder, jaw clenched tight.
