Christiana and Jane’s father. Lillian’s unrequited love. Lord Devon’s blind heart. Edmund’s blue ribbon. And even Katherine’s habitual sadness. If she did not learn her lesson from these and keep her distance from love, she was not as smart as George insisted she was.
If only George had remained Sir George, her friend. Gruff and authoritative, serious but with a slow smile sure to charm. Logical but sensitive. A familiar comforting presence. Perhaps then she could have married him.
Blast Edmund’s dark study. She’d seen him differently that night and could not go back. But perhaps the change had happened sooner. For some reason, she had never been able to dislodge one of their few encounters during her London season from her memory. They’d played cards with friends, and he’d sat an inch too close, looked at her a moment too long, heated her blood a degree more than she’d ever have admitted to herself.
Until now. There was no denying the changenow.
Now he was Lord of Confusions, new and dangerous, full of heart-stopping kisses and pitiful revelations.
So different from before. Yet still everything from before as well. A tempting combination that dared her to, well,dare.
A shiver of fear raced down her spine.
Where was Newburton to be found? She must find him and tell him her decision, then before dinner, they’d announce it together to the assembled guests. But first she must deal with her stepmother.
Chapter 17
Christiana grinned and slid a finger up and down her arm. “Well, well, what have you been up to out here? You’re lookingquitetousled. And I know what tousled looks like.”
Jane found her legs and pushed past her stepmother. “I’ve much to do today, Christiana. If you’ll excuse me.”
“I won’t. Now stay put before I say something I will likely not regret but that you will dislike considerably.”
Jane stopped, though her mind followed George. He must be going upstairs to pack his belongings. How long would it take? He’d arrived with little to nothing, expecting to stay an hour, not days. He could be gone with his next breath.
She was glad he was leaving. She could not make the correct, safe choice of a husband without inconvenient lust clouding her judgement.
Christiana snapped her fingers in front of Jane’s face. “Stop thinking of that man’s excellent arse and attend my conversation.”
“What man?”
“You know perfectly well who I mean. Lord Abbington. And do not deny the quality of the man’s rump. Anyone who’s seen it knows. It’s no crime to admire. But he’ll not marry you, so do not linger over such visions. Now, I woke up dreadfully early expressly to speak with you. Few days remain. The time has come. You must tell your father you choose Lord Sharpton.”
Jane blinked fully into wakefulness. “Lord Sharpton.” She tried not to guffaw, but a few shoulder-shaking chuckles emerged.
“Tis no joke. Before dinner. You must announce it.”
“I’m not marrying Lord Sharpton.”
“You must,” Christiana said, her voice rising on a petulant whine.
“I see no necessary compulsion. I’ve made my decision. Mr. Newburton.”
“That soapmaker? No. Come. Sharpy needs the blunt your dowry can bring him, and you’ll have a title. None of those other men can give you that.”
“You wish to marry me off to your lover.”
“Former lover. And I can assure you, he’s a very good one.”
“You get an allowance from my father. Give him that.”
“Your father is terribly stingy. When he found out I was giving money to Sharpy, he cut me off. He said I could have the man in my bed, but he’d not let him into the coffers.Hmph.” She crossed her arms under her chest. “But I don’t want him in my bed any longer. Your father has proven quite vigorous enough for me. I just want to pay back what I owe dear Sharpy.”
This,Christiana, was why Jane could not marry a man she loved, could not continue to live a daring existence. Christiana dared to go against all social conventions. And she dared to love a man so much she’d marry her stepdaughter off to her former lover to keep her love comfortably flush.
“You must love Lord Sharpton very much,” Jane said.
Christiana laughed, her petulant arm cross turning into a full belly hold as she doubled over. When she finally caught her breath, she said, “Me? Love Sharpy? Goodness no. He amuses me, and he lost much of his money spending it on me.”
