Internally, I reel. She doesn’tcareabout what’s inside the books?! They’re simply props, never to be opened, pored over. Read and appreciated. Argh, my heart.
However, she’s the customer, and customers are always right even when they’re wrong. Right? My job here is to sell books and make money for Gran. I keep my feelings to myself and will my lips to relax into a warm smile.
‘OK, I’d suggest a mix of these.’ I pull out a book about flower-infused cocktails, in pastel pink. To match that I choose a book about Chanel fashion through the ages in a creamy peach and then an art book with a white and gold spine. ‘Sitting together as a trio they …’
‘Fine. Wrap them.’
Wrap them,please.Just as I’m muttering internally about horrible customers Zeus wanders in and sticks his nose under her skirt. She jumps with a scream. ‘Sorry. He really shouldn’t have done that without your consent.’
‘Consent? He’s a dog!’
‘Yes, but he’s a very clever dog and even though he’s old he’s proving quite capable when it comes to training him not to look up ladies’ skirts. But he has his bad days.’ He does it again. ‘Obviously, like all of us, he’s a work in progress.’
She holds her skirt tight against her side. ‘Surely it’s against health and safety to have a big dirty dog like that mooching around sticking his nose where it most certainly does not belong?’
Dirty dog? I take offence after my efforts washing him. His fur is fluffy and clean. ‘He’s employed to ward off thieves.’ It’s the best I can come up with as this woman is intimidating the reason right out of my brain.
‘Now I’ve heard everything. Can you move a little faster? I’ve got places to be.’
‘Sure.’ She’s definitely not going on the Bibliotherapy Christmas card list. Zeus sits beside Gran, and I’m not sure if I imagine it or not but he seems to be grinning. Did he behave like that on purpose to usher the woman out faster? Wonders will never cease.
Gran pastes on a bright smile that’s as fake as the woman’s tan. ‘We’re holding a launch party soon for our exclusive club: Epeolatry. Strictly invitation only. Would you like to join as a member?’
‘What kind of club is it?’
‘A night-time library.’
‘Oh God no, who has time for reading? Bores me to tears. Even if it is exclusive, it sounds decidedly dull.’
As I wrap her beautiful artistic coffee table books in tissue paper, I damn near bite my own lip off to stop a retort that would surely get us gossiped about around the island. And because confronting her would be terrifying. No. Instead I mutter about her silently in my mind, and I win the argument too.
Gran says. ‘Totally understand – not everyone can afford to be a member. Times are tough these days what with the skyrocketing price of living.’
‘Excuse me?’ She glares at Gran so hard I’m almost certain she’s going to spontaneously combust. ‘Are you implying I can’t afford to join?’
‘Not many can, darling. It’sthatexclusive. A literary hideout for book lovers, you know. Very low-key, very chill. Very prestigious.’
‘Sign me up.’ She flicks her credit card at me. ‘And my husband too.’
I smother a grin and ask her to fill out her details on a sign-up form so I can add them to the database. ‘You’ll get your membership cards in the mail soon and we’ll send you an invite to the launch.’
‘Fine.’
When she leaves with her bundle of books, I face Gran. ‘That wasn’t very nice.’
‘Neither was she. But isn’t Zeus a good boy!’ She gives him a pat under the chin.
‘What were you thinking? Now she’s a member and we’ll have to put up with her.’
Gran chews her lip before saying, ‘Doubt we’ll ever see her again. It’s just sales, Evie. Everyone has their pressure point and hers is obviously trying to fit in by impressing people with her lavish tastes. Let’s think of it as a donation to the greater good of literature.’
My jaw drops. ‘You cunning fox.’
Gran sits on a stool behind the counter, shuffling paperwork that needs to be inputted into the accounts program. ‘That’s me. Now, how is our mailing list going?’
I join her behind the counter and bring it up on screen. Just how is Gran going to manage all of this when I’m gone? There’s a lot to be done in terms of working in the bookshop, Epeolatry and the time-consuming behind-the-scenes stuff, like stock purchasing and promotion and marketing. She’s going to need staff, but I guess, first things first. Rent money.
*
