For years, I’ve done nothing about the rejected bond except stay away and hope that the pain fades. But as I spar with Dana, the two of us checking our movements, each kick and punch fluid and aggressive, I can feel the pain of the bond in my chest. It flares to life like this every once and a while, and if I weren’t used to breathing through pain by now, it’d probably bring me to my knees from the sheer agony.
Our fight today draws a crowd. Spectators from the fringes watch as they stretch and warm up for their own workouts, most of them working with weights rather than sparring. I hear whispers as I sweep Dana’s legs out from under her, and I do my best to zone them out.
But as Dana taps out in the middle of our grappling, and I step back, having won with sheer grit and determination, I take a second to look around us.
The crowd is bigger than normal.
And it’s not just shifters from the outskirts today. I recognize a few of my old neighbors from the center of the pack lands. There’s Eddy, who runs the dive bar near the gas station. Victoria, who teaches young shifter girls ballet. Even one of Gran’s neighbors, old man Pete, has shown up to watch. And he pretty much only goes outside his little neighborhood for Alpha Cade, or…
Kieran.
I can feel the bond flaring to life. Even though I should be proud of myself at beating Dana today, all I feel is the pack’s judgmental gaze, and this strange, hollow feeling in my chest. That can only mean one thing: he’s nearby.
“You good?” Dana shoots me a quizzical look, glancing around us at the crowd watching from a distance. “Normally you gloat a little bit more than this, especially if you beat me in the first round.”
“I’m alright,” I tell her without making eye contact, watching as the gazes in the crowd take me in with scorn. “Just not used to being watched this closely.”
That’s when I see him, watching from afar. He’s standing near one of the ramshackle houses set up in this part of the outskirts, most of them built into the hill.
From this distance, I can’t see his face, which is probably for the best. In my mind he’s looking at me as he was in my dream: with hatred and disgust.
I know it’s him even from afar. He’s watching me too. I can feel it from the bond, which pulses like a living thing in my chest, painfully aware of his presence.
And his distance.
Scanning the crowd, I realize that I’m surrounded by the pack. Being watched by my mate. Supported by my best friend, after winning a round of sparring against her.
Yet I’ve never felt so completely and totally alone.
“Let’s go another round,” I tell Dana, meeting her eyes as I wipe the sweat off my neck. “I’m not done yet.”
“That’s my girl.”
Then, with a grin, she tackles me to the ground so hard that I can feel the bruises bloom on my ribs—and I’ve never been so grateful in my life.
Chapter 2
Kieran
I can still feel her presence, can smell her scent lingering on my skin. That should be impossible, since we haven’t even touched—haven’t beenin the same room—since that fateful day five years ago. Yet despite all of that, she’s on me, her lilac and honey scent driving me mad.
“We have to deal with this before it comes for Pack Jade and takes us all out,” Elder Mariana is arguing, her severe face pinched with frustration. “The madness is spreading again, and we have no way of stopping it. We don’t even know for sure what’s causing it!”
My father is staring at me, expecting me to participate in this meeting. I murmur something agreeable along with the others, but he doesn’t look satisfied. Inside me, my wolf paces restlessly, yearning for his mate. He snaps his teeth and shakes his head in irritation, the smell of her driving him wild.
I should’ve taken the long way home. But I just had to cut through the training grounds. Even though I told myself that it wasn’t about her—she wasn’t eventhereanymore—her scent still lingered.
Now it’s all over me. I shift in my seat, thankful when one of the other elders takes over for a moment. I’ve attended dozens ofthese meetings over the past five years, trying to settle into my position as the next alpha, and no matter what, it always seems like they take far longer than they should and yet never come to any sort of conclusion.
“…Kieran.”
I distantly hear my name, but I know that whatever it’s about, it doesn’t matter. So I just nod vaguely and smile, letting the conversation wash over me.
She looked good. Older, stronger, fitter. I couldn’t see her face from a distance, but I saw that she was sparring with that old friend of hers, Dana, who went to Pack Amethyst then came back again.
“—Kieran, was just…”
I wish I’d been able to get closer to her. But even from that far away, just seeing her in the distance made my wolf howl mournfully. He paced restlessly beneath my skin, nearly forcing me to shift.
