We’d fought in here. She’d threatened to push me off the fire escape when she was mad. And she promised to love me forever right there.
My knees must have given out, because I was somehow sitting where her bed used to be. I’d held her right here when she’d cried. I held her in my arms, hoping she’d feel whole again when she lost her uncle.
I promised her forever. Forever wasn’t supposed to be only for a few months. This wasn’t supposed to be what happened to us. She should have been here with me.
My fingers fumbled, pulling my phone out of my pocket. And I texted the one person who would understand. Not my high school friends. Not Tanner. “I don’t want to feel alone,” I texted.
Kennedy’s response came almost immediately. “Are you still in her apartment?”
I didn’t have time to respond before I heard the door creak. She was limping slightly, but she still showed up. She sat down next to me and put her head on my shoulder, just like she always did when we visited Brooklyn’s grave. And she didn’t say a word when I cried. And I didn’t say a word when I heard her sniffling either.
Her right hand was resting on her thigh. I reached out, lacing her fingers with mine. How had I been surviving without her? She’d been my rock after Brooklyn died. I looked down at her tear-stained face. I’d asked Brooklyn to send me a sign. Kennedy was it. I knew it. She had to be. I closed my eyes and exhaled slowly, the smell of home surrounding me. I just didn’t know what I was supposed to do with this sign.
Matchmaker - Chapter 28
Wednesday
The light streaming into my room made me close my eyes tighter. My whole body ached. What was I sleeping on? Bricks?
Someone moaned.
I opened my eyes and stared down at Kennedy’s head on my chest. We weren’t in my room. We were still on the hardwood floor in Brooklyn’s old apartment. My back ached. But for just a few minutes, I didn’t move. All I could do was stare down at Kennedy.
She sniffled like she was crying in her sleep. My chest ached. But it had nothing to do with her head lying on it. It was something deeper. And it hurt more as I stared at her. Despite the ache in my chest, it had been a long time since I’d woken up feeling so…okay. Like my breaths were coming easier. And I was very aware it was because of her.
I reached out to run my fingers through her hair, but I pulled back before I made contact. She was sleeping so peacefully. Her breath slowly rising and falling.
I felt sick to my stomach. This was where Brooklyn and I had fallen asleep. I never should have come in here. I never should have asked Kennedy to come. But still, I didn’t move.
Had Kennedy shown up because I needed a friend?
Or had she shown back up in my life because I just needed her?
And I did need her. I think maybe I’d needed her this whole time. She was the only one that understood. She was the only one that felt my pain so acutely. I’d always loved Kennedy as a friend. She’d been there when I’d needed her the most. I wasn’t sure how I’d even pretended to be okay while she wasn’t in New York.
I heard my phone vibrating on the floorboards where I’d left it last night. I wished it would stop. I wished I could freeze time.
But Kennedy yawned and slowly opened her eyes. For a second she seemed just as disoriented as I was. But when she realized I was her pillow, she sat up super fast. “I’m so sorry, we must have fallen asleep.” She wiped the side of her face like she was worried there’d be drool or something.
There wasn’t. She looked beautiful. Honestly, I’d never seen her look more beautiful. Her eyes rimmed with red were real. And I always loved real beauty over a made up face any day.
“Sorry,” she said again, running her fingers through her hair, just like I’d wanted to do a second ago.
I wasn’t sure why she was apologizing. It was more my fault than hers. “How is your ankle feeling?”
She rotated her ankle slowly and smiled. “It actually feels quite a bit better. I guess a night on a hard floor was just what it needed?” She laughed.
There was another buzzing sound. Kennedy leaned over me and grabbed my phone off the ground.
I was tempted to pull her down on top of me. To hold her like she’d held me last night.
“Is this the time?” she asked. “Shit, I have to go.” She ran her fingers through her hair again and pushed herself up.
I slowly sat up. “What time is it?”
“Nearly 7. And you have like 20 missed calls.” She handed me my phone.
I clicked on the screen. I also had about 50 unread texts. All from Tanner. I clicked on the top one: “Where the hell are you?! I’ve been waiting up all night for you!”
