“I have Pruitt blood in my veins,” I said and looked down at my hands. “You told me what that meant. That the Pruitts’ whole family is a disease…”
“I didn’t mean you.”
“You called them toxic. I’m them, Matt.”
“You’re not…”
“I want her to die.” I looked back up at him. “When she drove away in her stupid limo, that’s what kept me going. I wanted to get back at her. But really…I think I’d be happy if she died. I’m a monster. I’m a Pruitt.” I felt big tears roll down my cheeks.
“You’re not a monster.” He grabbed both sides of my face. “Baby.”
My heart ached whenever he called me that.
“Look at me.”
My eyes locked with his.
“Wanting revenge for this is a normal reaction. I want to fucking kill her myself for what she did to you.” He wiped some of my tears away with this thumbs. “But you’d never actually do it. You’re not evil. Isabella hurt you and you’re hurting. That’s the end of the story.”
Was that the end of the story? I felt his love. And with it, there shouldn’t have been any room for hate. But God I hated Isabella.
“You’re better than her.” He dropped his forehead to mine. “Your heart is too good to ever be like her.”
I wanted to believe him.I’m good. I’m not like Isabella.And even though I trusted my dad, I’d never trust Isabella. “Please don’t make me go back there.” I felt lighter since stepping foot in Matt’s house. Despite his dad hating me, I felt safe here. I felt like I’d shaken some kind of darkness off my shoulders. Maybe it was just because I was breathing in Matt’s exhales. The familiarscent of cinnamon was calming and exhilarating at the same time.
I didn’t want to be evil. I didn’t want to kill anyone. That was crazy. I wasn’t crazy. I lifted my leg, straddling Matt on his bed. It was like the closer I got to him, the more I felt like myself.
His hands settled on my waist. “You’re driving me crazy,” he said against my lips.
I’d rather him be the crazy one than me. I pressed my lips against his and savored the groan I got from him. His fingers tightened on my waist as I deepened the kiss. I knew I should have been telling him about awkwardly showering with James. Or how I’d been spending most of my nights in Miller’s bed. But I needed this. I needed him. And I could feel him beneath me. He needed me too.
For just a few minutes we were a happy couple. No ups and downs. No good or bad moments. Just us. I left a trail of kisses down his neck and got another delicious groan from him.
His hands splayed against the top of my thighs, his thumbs dangerously close to touching me where I’d dreamt about.
Normally we’d stay like this. He was patient with me. Always waiting.
But I’d told him my darkest fear and he’d washed it away. He knew me. He loved me. And I wanted to do for him what his brother so casually mentioned. What I’d literally seen Rachel do to James. Wasn’t that what he needed from me?
I tried to move off his lap to get down on my knees.
“What are you doing?” he said, his fingers digging into my skin, not letting me move.
“I want to do that…thing.”
“What thing?”
I ran my index finger along the waist of his jeans.
His lips brushed against my ear. “Say it.”
“I want to show you how much I love you.”
“How am I supposed to know that you’re ready if you won’t say it?” he whispered in my ear.
I swallowed hard. “I want to lick you.”
“Where, baby?” The scruff of his 5 o’clock shadow was rough against my jaw.
