“So, you paid your way through college on your own?” It must be a lot of money because she’s always been well-dressed and she’s had her own apartment for three years. Even though I hate that she got attacked in front of it, the truth is her apartment is in a nice area. It was a probably random act of violence.
Never once in the past four years did I consider she had no family backing her education. I could kick myself for never asking. I’ve held her at arm’s length all this time and she’s been alone.
“Where did you go for holidays?”
“I didn’t. I stayed in my apartment. If anyone asked, I lied and told them I went home.”
My chest tightens. Fuck.
“And Natasha doesn’t know?”
“She and I didn’t become close friends until about six months ago at the beginning of our last semester. I’ve vaguely mentioned that I don’t get along with my family, but that’s all she knows.”
I stroke her hair, trying to remain calm. No wonder Simone is such an old soul. She’s been dealing with adult situations since she was far too young. Most college students can’t manage money. They don’t even pay their own bills. She’s been doing all that and more for four years.
“And you had enough money to get through college without getting a part-time job?”
She stares at me for a long time. I think she’s trying to decide how much she wants to tell me.
I wait, wanting her to trust me. I want everything from her.
Eventually, she looks around my bedroom. “I’ll answer your question. I’m not trying to avoid it, but may I ask you something first?”
“Of course, Baby girl. Anything.”
“Do you need to work? Do you need your job as an English professor?”
“No. Both of my parents are still living, and I don’t need a dime from them. My grandparents left me a sizable inheritance, and my parents turned the deed to this house over to me five years ago when they retired to Florida. I work because I enjoy it and I want to keep my mind occupied.”
“I don’t need to work either, Camden. I went to school so I could pretend to be a normal person. A regular college student. I thought it might help me fit in if I blended in and did what other eighteen-year-olds do.”
“And? Were you right?”
“No.”
I’m a bit taken aback. I feel sad for her. Her eyes are not dancing. She’s not sassing me. She’s so very serious. I’ve never seen her this serious. “Why not, Little one?”
“For the same reason I left home and never looked back. I’m Little. I’ve known it for a long time. I spent my first year in the dorms, but it was a struggle repressing who I am on the inside. My second year, I got my own apartment, and that’s when I was really able to open up. Not in front of other people, but alone. For the first time in my life, I could be openly Little in my private space.”
My God.
“When I realized Natasha was Little…it changed my life. She’s the first friend I’ve had who is genuinely Little, and she didn’t even realize she was into age play when we started hanging out. She learned about it mostly from me while Jameson was being too stubborn to tell her he was a Daddy.”
She gives me an evil side-eye.
I chuckle. “Jameson can be stubborn. He didn’t want to risk losing her.”
“He’s never going to lose her.”
“Well, he didn’t know that.” I continue stroking Simone’s hair. It’s so soft. “What about Surrender? I’ve seen you there. I know you go. There are tons of Littles there. You haven’t made any friends there?”
“I’ve made some friends, yeah, but not many are my age. A lot of them are career women who dabble on the side, or they have full-time Daddies like Natasha. I have fun with them, but they aren’t free on a Wednesday night to come over to my stupid apartment and play Barbies.”
My heart hurts for this girl. I hold her closer, trying not to cause her pain. “I’m so sorry, Little one. If I’d known…”
“What? What would you have done if you’d known I was alone at Christmas three years ago or even six months ago? What would you have done if you’d known any of this?”
I draw in a deep breath. I know my answer, but is she ready to hear it? Finally, I give her hair a gentle tug, so she’ll tip her head back and really look at me. “I probably would have quit my job and claimed you.”
