My attention swings to the expanse of grass behind me, where a checkered blanket is spread out beside the base of a big tree, topped with a book and a ceramic bowl of green grapes. The image is so wholesome. “Why?”
She blinks back over to me. “Why what?”
“Why are you doing that?”
“Reading?”
“Yeah.”
“Because I enjoy reading,” she says, like it’s really fucking obvious. “What do you enjoy?”
I open my mouth to speak before realizing…I don’t know. Do I have any hobbies? Interests? I like acting. For a long time, it was my entire life.
Now?
I’m not sure. Whatever passes the time, I guess.
But that sounds thoroughly pathetic, so I reroute the statement and pin it on her. “Curious about me, Nicks?”
More blush brightens her cheeks, turning them rosy. “Not really.”
“What’s your mom like?”
The question takes her off guard as she glances at me, then wheels her focus to across the field. Her mom is still bent over the garden, plucking veggies from stems and placing them in a wicker basket. “Um…she’s great.”
I nod, shifting in my seat. “Do you guys grow your own dinner and shit?”
“Components of it, yes. The fruits and vegetables. Eggs.” Stevie slips her fingertips into the pockets of her shorts and shrugs her shoulders. “We have a cow for dairy.”
“You have a fucking cow?”
“Emmy. She’s grazing behind the house.”
I stare at the red house as if I can see right through it.
A fucking cow.
Scratching at the shadow of stubble lining my jaw, I look back over at her.
She’s fidgeting now, shuffling between both bare feet and sinking her toes into the spongy grass. “Why are you still here?” Stevie says it with full-fledged curiosity and not a trace of hostility. She’s genuinely confused by my prolonged trespassing. “Were you looking to…talk?”
“Not much of a talker.”
Her nose scrunches up at that.
It’s cute.
A wash of silence blankets us, deflating her shoulders and smoothing out the crease in her nose. “Your audition…” Stevie leans into the car, her fingers curling around the doorframe. “It was good, Lex. Really good.” Swallowing, she studies me for a beat, her green eyes trailing over my stoic expression. “I was impressed.”
Sunshine bathes her in a warm crown of light, distracting me for a handful of seconds. Then her words register, and my brows pull together. I could use the moment to let my guard down, to be raw and honest, to thank her for the compliment.
She doesn’t realize how freeing it felt to be up on that stage.
She doesn’t know how nice it is to hear those words.
But I can’t muster a response, can’t bring myself to be vulnerable with her so close, so I say nothing. If she was looking for more, she’ll be searching forever.
She must know this, because her face falls, expression wilting. “Okay then,” she breathes out, glancing inside my car’s splashy interior. “The next few months will be interesting.”
