Whereas Lindsey was a constant torrent of verbal effluvia, Esmé was cool and taciturn in a manner that Jane foundoff-putting, all the more so because she oozed unctuous charm when talking with a client. Esmé was the teacher’s pet type, bossy yet obsequious, a relentless self-promoter. The niche that she had laid claim to was being the best Instragrammer of all the women at the company.
After curt greetings, Jane and Esmé approached the house, a charming Spanish colonial, where they noticed a tall, wiry man with shoulder-length dark hair pacing on the lawn. He was in the midst of a heated phone conversation and becoming increasingly agitated. Was this an emotionally disturbed person or the client? Uncertain, Jane and Esmé waited outside the front gate and listened.
“Well thank you ever so much for keeping me on hold for a fucking hour just to tell me that you aren’t going to do a single thing! I appreciate the care and concern for law-abiding citizens... you really think I’m going to now sink more time into this and come down and wait for an hour to file some paperwork that you’ll throw away? If you aren’t going to investigate then tell me what the point is?... What? That’s just great. Listen, I don’t want to be placated, I want someone to do something! Clearly, I was an idiot to think that when a crime is committed, I should call the police!”
Jane and Esmé exchanged looks.
“Yeah, thanks, have a super blessed day.”
Jane pressed the doorbell, inciting a riot of barking dogs. The man walked over.
“Hello, sorry, my car was broken into right in front of my house last night and the cops are completely useless. It’s really, really annoying.”
He had swarthy good looks, a slim build, and torrents of wild brown hair. It was hard to pinpoint his age; he was probably in his forties. Before Jane could speak, Esmé jumped in.
“No worries! I’m sorry about that, it’s the worst. Are you Eric?”
The man looked befuddled.
“Yes, I am. Sorry, do I know you?”
“This is Jane, and I’m Esmé. We’re here to organize.”
Eric’s eyes glazed over as he processed this information.
“Oh... that’s today? Honestly I sort of spaced you were coming today. So sorry, but I’m not at all ready.”
“You don’t need to be ready! We can do it all for you.” Esmé loved to pander.
He opened the gate, and they stepped into the yard.
“Are you both comfortable with dogs?” he asked.
“Of course!” Esmé declared. Jane could tell she was faking it.
Eric opened the front door and three large dogs bounded out: a mutt that looked mostly pit bull, a German shepherd, and some sort of Australian cattle dog mix. They took turns warily sniffing the new arrivals.
“They’re all friendly, just very high energy. Come on in. I’ll put them in the backyard.”
Esmé swept ahead into the foyer and Jane resigned herself to hanging back. It wasn’t worth competing to keep up with Esmé. After all, she was working on opening her heart, and anything that might infect it was best kept at a safe distance.
The dogs soon lost interest in them and became caught up in their volatile pack dynamic, barking, growling, and nipping at one another. The cattle dog curled its lips, issuing a guttural warning growl at the German shepherd.
“Betty, NO!” Eric shouted. “Ladies, calm down, behave!” The dogs seemed mildly chastened. “They’re all girls, my girls. They get very excited when they meet new people.” He herded them into the backyard and closed the door.
“Your home is gorgeous!” Esmé exclaimed.
“Yes, lovely,” Jane added as she looked around. The walls were covered from floor to ceiling with varying kinds of art and posters, some fine paintings, some total kitsch. The coffee table in the living room was covered with towering stacks of books. Dog toys were scattered throughout. It wasn’t exactly messy—more stuffed to the gills.
“So, is there a room or particular area you want us to focus on?” Esmé asked.
Eric’s eyes, a deep and soulful mahogany brown, glazed over as he pondered. It was like a computer timing out.
“We can walk through the house and tell you where we think we could be the most helpful,” Jane offered.
Eric came back to life.
“That would be great. I’m a little stressed. I’m on a deadline and way, way behind schedule.”
