“I see.” He relaxed a little. “Still, that sounds pretty heavy.”
“It is. Or was. Most of my life, friends were not easy to comeby. Or relationships, for that matter. I’d find someone who sort of got me, but then my family drama would creep in and make it unworkable. And then my mom got sick, and I had to take care of her and my sister, and, you know, life can be too much sometimes.”Stop talking. He’ll think you’re one big pity party if he doesn’t already. No one wants to hear your tale of woe. No one wants to be friends with someone who has that kind of drama lurking in the background.“Anyhoo!” She slapped her hands on her knees like she’d just said she was thinking of buying a car, or she had some work to do when she got home. No biggie.
But Seth’s expression made her feel like he was seeing a lot more than she’d intended, and ever the one to close the door before anyone could see too much of her, she said, “In other words, a lot of stuff happened and now I’m kind of a loner, but I’m working on it. Like, working on getting out of my shell. Or in my case, a bomb shelter.”Ha ha ha, you’re so funny, Lorna! For heaven’s sake, shut UP.But her mouth wouldn’t stop. “Inside joke,” she said. “I guess what I’m trying to say is that I have some unresolved issues.”
“Right,” Seth said. “The apology tour.”
“Yes! And Bean has been my friend and helper. But I would never, you know, expose him to anything, like...bad.” She smiled, but she could tell it wasn’t a real smile. It was a smile of worry, of fear. She couldn’t peel her eyes from Seth, silently willing him not to take her friend. Silently begging him to still like her, to want to be her friend.
“I don’t know,” Seth said, wincing. “What about the musical?”
Lorna blinked. And then she laughed. She reallylaughed. “Correction—nothing as bad as that.”
He leaned forward and put his hand on the table between them, almost as if he was reaching for her. “I can understand, in a way,” he said. “Not like what you’re talking about, but how addiction can affect a family.”
“Really?” she asked.
“My wife, Jill, was addicted to exercise. Or maybe that’s OCD, I’m not sure. But it was a problem.”
Lorna didn’t know what to say.
“I’m not trying to equate my wife to your sister. I’m just saying I understand what it’s like to live in the shadow of someone else’s obsession. It can take over everything. Especially everything that was good.”
Hello.She had the insane urge to hug him right now. “Exactly,” she said quietly. She’d never met anyone who knew the hell it was to live with an addict. She wasn’t sure Seth truly knew either, but what mattered was that he understood her. Or was trying to. He was relating to her experience. And she liked that feeling.
She liked it so much.
“So can Bean still be my friend?” Lorna asked.
Seth frowned. “Are you kidding? He needs your friendship, Lorna. It’s not like kids are lining up around the block to be his friend. I have to insist on it.”
A warm, fizzy feeling shot through her. Her face cracked with what she could tell was one of those crazy,too-too-muchsmiles. But hearing him say Bean needed her had just blown out a few more windows in her internal bomb shelter, and sunlight was streaming in.
The talk turned to whatever it was Bean had organized the kids to do. Which turned out to be a choreographed show of sliding skills. A half hour later, Seth said it was time to go.
“Thanks for this,” Lorna said.
Seth smiled and put his hand on her arm. “You’re welcome. Bean and I are just happy to be a part of your tour.” He moved his hand down to her elbow and gave it a soft squeeze before letting go.
She waved to them and got into her car. And then she headed in a different direction than her apartment.
When she arrived at Peggy’s house, she could see the blue glow of the TV through the windows. She slapped the metal rooster on her way to the door... but it was a friendly slap, aPleased to see youslap. The rooster didn’t make her angry anymore.
Peggy opened the door in a robe and with curlers in her hair under an old-fashioned net. “I knew it was you,” she said with much cheer.
“I’m sorry to come so late,” Lorna said.
“Oh, that’s all right, Lolo. I’m always happy to see you. Come in!”
Lorna stepped through the door and handed Peggy the crumpled church musical program.
Peggy frowned as she perused it. “You went to church?”
“Sort of. I was in Mr. Sanders’s play. He was my choir teacher. You know, the choir concert—”
Peggy gasped with delight. “Of course I remember! From the list.”
Lorna nodded. “My name isn’t on the program because it was sort of last minute. But the point is, I apologized. And I made it up to him.”
