“Yeah, that’s the glory of finding something you love. It serves your purpose. Sometimes I just want to disappear into a fictional world and fall in love with a fictional man. They’re always better than the real thing anyway. Oh, before you leave I have to give you a copy of this book that I read a few weeks back and loved. God, it was incredible.”
Cillian blanches. “Please do not subject me to talk of your romance books, Ais. Please, I’m literally begging you.”
The expression on his face is comical, and I can’t help but giggle.
“It would be the most interesting thing to happen to you all week, Cillian,” she retorts sassily.
And that’s exactly the way dinner goes, the two of them teasing each other in between the questions Aisling asks me. It genuinelyfeels like she wants to know me, not just because Cillian and I are friends but because she’s interested.
After we finish eating, we end up on the worn couch in the living room while Aisling grabs a snack. She told me tonight that she’s got type 1 diabetes, something that Cillian had already mentioned to me in passing, and she has to monitor her blood sugar and be mindful about what she eats. Hence the cauliflower pizza she had for dinner. I make a mental note to try to find a type of dessert to bake for her that I could sub sugar for an alternative.
Cillian’s sitting beside me, close enough that his leg is pressed against mine, but otherwise not touching me. It feels weird, being this close to him without touching him, and that realization makes a swirl of anxiousness appear in my stomach.
How easily I could become… attached to him even knowing that this is temporary, and that we’re simply a casual hookup.
“You good, St. James?” Cillian whispers near my ear, his breath fanning along my earlobe and causing me to shiver.
I nod, forcing a small smile. I’m not ever going to mention the thoughts racing through my brain. They’re fleeting anyway. As long as I remind myself that I knew exactly what I was getting into, what I practically begged him for, I’ll be fine.
“I can take you home if you want. You don’t have to stay for the movie if you don’t want to.”
I turn my head to face him, lifting a brow. “Are you trying to get out of this movie? Because you’re scared?”
His head drops back against the couch as he laughs. “As if. I’m not scared of a fucking horror movie, Rory. I just get a bit queasy with blood.”
“You’re arugby player…” I say, unable to keep the disbelieffrom my tone. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen a rugby match that didn’t have some type of bleeding injury.”
“Nah, that type of blood doesn’t bother me, it’s the crazy shit on the screen that does. Guts and organs and shit.”
I chew the inside of my lip for a moment before saying, “You know, this reminds me of Wren and the caterpillar debacle.”
“Absolutely not,” he deadpans, shooting me a glare.
I smile, shifting slightly to lean into his side. “It’s okay to be afraid. Even if you are this big, broody, muscley guy, Cillian. Real men have fears too. Everyone does.”
“Bloody hell,” he mutters before throwing his arm over my shoulder and hauling me against his side, giving me the perfect spot to admire all of said muscles.
Aisling comes bounding back into the living room, a bowl of carrots with ranch drizzled over the top of them. “Ready? This one is gory, Kill. Your fav!”
The rumble of his groan fills the room around us, and I don’t even try to hide my smile.
CHAPTER 24
Cillian
I’m bloody fucking exhausted.
I stayed late after today’s practice to work on a few agility drills, and my entire body aches from overexertion. Even as conditioned as my body is, on days like today, I know I’ve pushed myself past my limits.
When it hurts to breathe… that’s a good sign I should take a shower and go the fuck home.
Lifting the hem of my tee, I drag it down my sweat-drenched face as I make my way off the training pitch to the locker rooms, still attempting to catch my breath after so many ladder drills my head’s still spinning.
“Yo, Cairney.”
My head snaps to the unexpected voice coming from behind me. Fitz and Michaels are walking down the empty hallway toward me.
I’m surprised to see them here since everyone went home after practice.