I shook my head.“Must have been a rough life for a girl.‘Specially a—a—”
“A colored girl?”She gave me a little smile that held all the sadness of the world.“Most of life is hard for any girl, I reckon.Harder than ’tis for any man.”She blinked and looked at the floor.“Even a white woman who grows up in wealth and comfort can die in a second from birthing a child.And if you’re colored, like me?Well, things is even harder.But I don’t wanna think about that.”She looked around her at the fine furnishings of Miss June’s parlor.“Here, in this place, I’m treated the same as any of the others—and that suits me fine.”
“That’s good,” I said.
“My momma died birthing me.And I swore I weren’t never gonna have children, e’en though that’s what they say all women are made for.”
I thought about that for a while.
“My friend, Irene, in Port Essington?She’s married, and she don’t want children.I reckon ’tis a woman’s choice, whether to have little ones or not—or it should be.”
Sally shrugged.“Sometimes it happens, and nobody can help it.”
“True enough,” I said.“Where did you get your learnin’, Sally?If you can read novels, you must have had some.”
“Oh, my daddy was smart and educated.He made sure I learned my letters and my numbers and sent me to school when he could.”She gave me a look that spoke volumes.“He was a good person, my daddy, and I loved him very much.I reckon…I reckon he wanted more for me than the life I’m leadin’.But it can’t be helped.”
“I’m sorry.”
Sally nodded.“Well.I’m fed and I’m clothed.”She gazed at her peignoir then gave me a wry smile.“In a manner of speakin’… And I’m surrounded by good people.That’s gotta count for somethin’.”
I thought back to my life with them outlaws.
“I reckon that counts for a whole lot, Sally.”
We sat in silence for a bit, listening to the sounds of the town out of the window as people moved about.Miss June kept the doors locked until about three or four in the afternoon, so we didn’t have to worry about men coming in to look for comfort as yet.’Twas nice to sit in the quiet and talk with Sally.From the sounds of more movement and noise upstairs, I figured more of the girls would come down soon, looking for breakfast and easy conversation.
“What’s it like in Port Essington, Jimmy?You and Oscar got a good setup there?”
I hadn’t thought about home in a while.I’d been so anxious to get here, then concerned about my leg and now worry about Oscar.All of a sudden, the memory of our beautiful new home and the people we’d left behind made my throat ache.
“Yeah.Real good.”
She smiled and raised her brows, urging me to continue.
“We got some good friends there,” I said, suddenly remembering my conversation with Carson before we’d left.I hoped Carson was enough of a friend to us that he’d keep our secret.He’d said he would, and I had no reason to doubt him, except for an eerie sense that things had gone well for us and that was bound to end at some point.’Twas the same sort of feeling I had with Oscar out in the world without me, that my life was too blessed, and I didn’t deserve this happiness.
“We built a house,” I said.
She raised her brows in surprise.
“You did?You and Oscar?”
I laughed.“Not only us.We had a lot of help, since we didn’t know how.’Twas a huge undertaking, but we got it done, and our house is standin’ and”—I blinked, remembering how it had looked and how it had felt to be living in it—“’tis such a lovely house, Sally.I never thought I’d ever live in a house like that.”
“Oh!Is it real grand?”
I laughed and shook my head.“Nah, ’tis a plain two-story house made of regular lumber.’Tis plain, I reckon, but ’tis real cozy and has lots of space for the two of us.More’n we need, probably, but I’m plenty grateful.”
Sally nodded.“I’m glad you and your beau—excuse me, your husband—are happy and able to be together.You’re lucky to have found each other, I reckon.’Specially because of the way the world is.”
“I know it,” I said, emotion rising in me, and unease because my young husband was out riding with Trick—and who knew where he was right now.
Just then, a couple of the other girls came down the stairs and convinced Sally to go to the kitchen with them for some breakfast.
“You want somethin’, Jimmy?”Sally asked.“Cook makes cinnamon rolls sometimes for breakfast, and they’re mighty tasty.I can bring you one, if you’d like?”
“Sure.That would be awful kind of you.”
