He doesn’t check in. He doesn’t kiss me good night or tell me he loves me. He tells me when he needs me to make an appearance as his perfect wife, and that’s it. It’s simple, easy, and safe, everything I didn’t have growing up. The constant fear, anxiety, and loneliness that I felt as a kid is something I never want to feel again.
So, I smile, I wave, and I laugh when I’m told. Because being wanted by Nic, even like this, is what I’ve always craved. I don’t want to lose that. I wouldn’t even know where to begin if Nic and I separated.
As we pull up to the event center, I’m a bit in awe. The entire outside is decorated in beautiful, soft white lights with a giant Christmas tree front and center. With the thick flakes of snow slowly falling down, it looks movie perfect. I have an urge to look for the machine creating it.
Nic pulls around front and puts the car in park in a growing line of luxury cars. The valets are already at his door and mine, opening them in perfect sync.
“Thank you,” I genuinely tell the young man, who seems nervous as hell.
He quickly nods. “Of course, ma’am. Have a wonderful evening.”
“Kat, hurry up. Stop talking to the staff and get over here,” Nic demands from the entrance doors.
“I hope you have a great night too.” I smile at the young man and walk away.
Nic offers me his arm as I approach, but I ignore it and walk through the entrance slightly in front of him.
“You don’t always have to be so rude, you know,” I snap.
“I don’t have the time or the energy for this shit tonight, Kat. The big investors will be here tonight and you don’t know the power they hold. Just keep your mouth closed, and smile and nod when appropriate,” Nic says with the kindest, warmest smile on his face as he waves to someone up ahead.
Sliding my arm into his, I pinch his side hard and smile at the approaching couple. Nic winces and squeezes my arm tighter.
“If it isn’t Nic Claus in the flesh,” the old, balding man says. His eyes fall to me—and by me, I mean, my breasts and the slit on my thigh. “And you must be Mrs. Claus. I have heard so much about you.”
I wait for him to offer his hand, but he doesn’t.
Classy.
I open my mouth to say something generic and expected but Nic cuts me off.
“Yes, this is Kat, my beautiful wife. And, Kat, this is Harold Orloff. He was a friend of my dad’s and is now a major investor in the company. I’m surprised this is the first time you two are meeting. But Harold and his wife, Diane, have been traveling constantly for the last few years.”
I wish I could travel anywhere but here right now.
I nod and smile, as told. “It is lovely to meet you.”
“We will meet again,” Harold says before dragging Diane along with him.
Her eyes are dull, almost lifeless.
Is that what my life will look like in fifty years? Doing the same old act I am right now? Will any part of me be left inside, or will I look like a hollow shell, like Diane?
These questions haunt me as we make our way through the crowd, stopping every so often to say hello to all of the male investors in the room. I would say we bypassed the female investors, but I have yet to be informed of them even existing.
It doesn’t surprise me that they don’t have any female investors. This group is the epitome of a boys’ club. Hence the women on their arms who look as lifeless as I feel.
Thankfully, dinner is already ready. But Nic is still standing here, chatting with another older man, who apparently has no control of his wandering eyes, even in the presence of his, I assume, wife.
“Well, I’d better get the missus over to our table,” Nic says with a doting tone.
But it’s for him. He was over this conversation minutes ago. I nod and smile at the man.
His wife smiles at me with daggers in her eyes. As if any part of me wants anything to do with her eye-humping husband.
“It was great catching up, Nic.” He shakes Nic’s hand. “Mrs. Claus, a pleasure.”
I wait for his arm to stretch out, but instead, he steps forward, dropping his wife’s hand, and slides his slimy hand behind my back, far too low.
