Cam stands up, and in my state of complete denial I join him, pushing all thoughts of my buried past away but falling short.
I can’t shake what his stare used to feel like on my body, what his soft lips on mine used to lead to, how his hand wrapped around my throat while he thrust into me used to make me beg him for more. How he was the only man I’ve ever loved. And the only man who made me so angry that I was ready to kill.
Soon, the rest of the room is on their feet, impatiently waiting for this guy, who I am praying is not Alec.
The hair on my neck rises as I hear the door click open and shut behind me.
I begin to turn, ready to see if it’s really him. Because there’s no way in hell it could behim.
Right?
He would be an idiot to set foot in this town again, to come near me again. I pivot around, facing my fears.
I slam my eyes shut, scared to look.
Please don’t be him.
Please don’t be him.
Please don’t be him.
I hear him mumble something, my eyes fly open, and all hope is lost.
The wind is knocked cold out of me as panic settles in my chest to remain hidden from him. I’m not confronting him, not after all of these years.
I spin to Cam, words falling from my lips without thought. “Look, I’m so sorry. I feel sick. I think I’m going to go home. I’ll call you.” I turn and take off for the door without giving him a chance to respond.
Alec still hasn’t noticed me yet as he’s turned to a couple of guys, so I quietly step behind him, reaching for the door.
All of a sudden, he’s pushed back into me. I stumble and lose my step. But warm, solid, familiar arms catch me, pulling me into a firm chest. I’m thrown back in time to the day we met, which was eerily similar to this.
His scent hits me, invading my senses in every way, with memories of our past overwhelming me.
Out of an old habit, I inhale deeply, bathing in the smell of him, of home.
But this isn’t my home anymore, and it never will be again. He steadies me and pulls back, getting a full look at me for the first time.
If he had anything to drink tonight, he’s completely sober now. His face drops, eyes boring into me.
“Lu? Is that really you?” His voice is so quiet that I barely hear it, but every word burns into my ears.
I’m frozen in his deep hazel gaze, locked in his arms. I want to run as fast as I can, but I also never want him to let go.
His voice grows louder, but it’s soft, caressing my heart. “Laura?”
I can’t do this. I can’t see him. I can’t—
Jerking out of his grasp, I bolt out of the door. I race down the hallway, hoping every turn I make will take me outside. I don’t stop until I burst into the cold air, which stretches over every burning cell in my body.
Heels click behind me. I can tell it’s Char before I even feel her grasp my shoulder.
“Are you okay? Oh my God, Laura, I had no idea. I swear. Just breathe. Come on. Let’s go.”
I can’t find the words. I don’t know if I will ever find them. What are the words for running into your ex-boyfriend? The only one you’ve ever loved. The only one you’ve ever wanted. The only one who ever destroyed you. And the only one who ever will.
Tell me what words describe the feeling of seeing the father of your son for the first time in years, the first time since he left you and your son all alone.
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