“I am confident.” Natalie sounds weary. “But I also know—I just. Forget it.”
“No, say it. You have to say it to somebody.” Her friend’s voice is sharp. “You think he’s going to leave you one day, don’t you?”
My hand clenches into a fist, a cold emotion piercing in my chest. Is that what she really thinks? Natalie thinks I’m just going to get bored of her?
“I’m not saying it will happen today,” she whispers.
“Do you think the man spent all these years looking for you only to walk away from you? Do you think that just because your mother and brother put you through all that bullshit, everybody else is going to do the same? Have I ever abandoned you? Three years, and I’m still attached to you like glue. And you and Ethan are going to have a child. That also changes a lot.”
“I know it’s stupid.” Natalie’s voice is hollow.
“No, it’s not,” Sarah retorts. “It’s normal to have these fears.It’s also important you live in the moment and you don’t let these fears affect your relationship. Do you think my parents haven’t had problems in all of the thirty years they’ve been together? You think their marriage was smooth as whiskey? Every couple has problems. You have to work through your problems. I believe that man loves you. And I know you have feelings for him you’re constantly trying to bury.”
“I’m not—I just don’t want to be hurt. I’m so tired of being tossed away by everyone. I just?—”
“It’s going to be fine, Nat. Nothing is set in stone. And yes, couples break up, but not all of them. And if you go into this expecting the relationship to implode, then that’s what will happen. Have some faith in yourself and in him. Right now, he seems to be the only one fighting for you two.”
“I know. I’m trying?—”
“No, you’re not. You’re hiding. You’re waiting for it to explode so that you can go back to your safe space where you have no attachments. But you’re forgetting this baby.”
Silence follows Sarah’s words, and then she asks, “Do you love him?”
“Ethan?”
“No, the Easter Bunny! Of course, I mean Ethan.”
I know that eavesdropping is wrong. But my heart is in my throat as I wait for Natalie’s answer.
“I think so.”
“What the heck does that mean?”
“I feel safe around him,” Natalie whispers. “He makes me happy. He makes me laugh even when I don’t want to. And he makes me want to wring his neck sometimes.”
“That’s love for you,” Sarah chuckles. “Focus on that. You have a chance here to be happy, Natalie. You’re moving in with him. My mother always says, ‘you can either manifest negativity or you can manifest happiness’. Things are moving for you, girl. I know it may be too fast, but this man loves you. It’s okay tolove him back. And it’s okay to be scared as well. The past is the past. He’s changed, and I know you see it. You need to show him you do because this isn’t just about you. If you keep him at arm’s length, waiting for him to walk away, you’re not the only one whose heart will break. He’s also got one. I’m sure it’s made of stone or something, but it’s there.”
Natalie’s weak laugh makes me straighten up.
I don’t want to hear anymore. I turn around to slip away, but as I do, I see Alex standing a short distance from me. It’s apparent that he, too, has heard the conversation.
He gestures with his head, and I head to the living room where the last boxes are being carried down, and I hear him say, “I’m going to heat up the food if you two ladies are done with the coffee.”
A couple of minutes later, Natalie carries out a tray with six mugs of coffee. Before I can move, Jake takes the tray from her, and she comes to sit down beside me on the two-seater.
“You okay?” I ask, pretending I don’t know that she just had a heart-to-heart with Sarah over me.
She looks around. “Three years, Ethan. It’s strange to know I will never come back here. But I’m ready to move on.”
She smiles at me, a slow hesitant smile, and her hand slips into mine.
“A new start.”
My heart warms, and I kiss her cheek, repeating, “A new start.”
CHAPTER 19
NATALIE
