My temper flares higher. I knew something had been bothering her back then. Something beyond normal family issues. Hail and I had flown home to visit her over spring break when she stopped replying to his messages. We’d only had one day with her before we had to jet off to another city for a show. Now, I regret not drilling her for answers.
But if I had known how people were treating her, I’m certain I would have ended up in jail with multiple assault charges.
Warm tears splatter on my chest as she returns to tracing my tattoos. “I let everyone get to me. Not just when I was younger. I didn’t stick up for Hail last Thanksgiving when my parents were being horrible to him. Did he tell you that? I invited him, pretending everything wouldbe fine when Iknewbetter. He’s always protecting me from them, and I couldn’t return the favor. Not even once.”
Stroking her back, I let her keep venting. I want all of that shit from her past expelled from her. She’s carried the toxicity long enough.
“I know I need to cut ties with my parents. This isn’t what a family should be. I’m just being weak. I don’t want to be a disappointment. More than that, I really don’t want to end up alone.”
Her words slice through me like a hot blade. I find some fucked up solace in the fact that I was never seeking acceptance from my dad like Hail and Stasi were from their parents. I knewexactlywhere I stood with him at all times. No confusion about it. Step out of line? Get beat. Breathe wrong? Get beat. Ace a test? Get beat for being a smartass.
The Koval kids were subjected to mental warfare. They were made to believe approval was the equivalent of love.
“You are far from weak, Anastasia,” I say firmly. “You are notwrongfor the things you like. And Hail has never blamed you for not speaking up. Most importantly, you will never be alone. Not when you have me.”
Sensing Beau’s stunned gaze on me, I add, “Both of you have me. For as long as you want me.”
Stasi snakes her arms around my waist and squeezes me.
Beau lifts a hand to brush a tear from her cheek. “Next time we’ll let Liam tie me up and make me cry, okay?”
This gets an exasperated laugh from her. “Okay.”
A whimpering sound breaks the intense moment, turning our heads to the bedroom.
“The dog,” Stas utters.
Freeing herself from my arms, she wipes away the rest of her tears and leaps from the tub with newfound energy. I have to laugh as she rips a towel from the vanity and rushes out of the bathroom.
Beau grins. “That dog isn’t going anywhere.”
“Unless it already has a home.”
His expression crumples. “Suppose I should hang around a little longer. You know, for emotional support.”
“Suppose you should.”
twenty-six
Beau
Iblame the headache for my insanity.
Sunk into my favorite velvet couch in the recording studio lobby, I browse the internet on my phone for real estate agents in Phoenix.
In my other hand, I’m holding a half-drank, overpriced strawberry milkshake. Liam gave me a critical look when the delivery guy walked in the door, but he didn’t refuse the shake I’d handed him.
Turns out I was right. Chocolateishis favorite flavor. Didn’t think he’d be a vanilla kind of guy.
There are only two things keeping me from impulsively putting my house on the market. One, my dad lives in Phoenix. Yeah, I haven’t talked to him in months, but it still doesn’t feel right to up and move without reaching out.
And two, I’m not sure if my sudden decision to make my stay permanent will go over well with Liam. I can’t shake the worry that I’m in too deep again. That he’ll wake up one morning and decide he doesn’t want me.
What if I’m in the way? What if he wants Stasi all to himself?
What if’s fucking suck, and they’re not helping my weird mood. Maybe I should have ordered a large milkshake instead of a medium.
I tip my head back and shut my eyes. Selling my house is a wild idea. Wilder than randomly buying a one-way plane ticket to Dallas.
