‘My mother may have stretched to Gogol Mogol but I have a feeling that Russian-style home cooking will not remind me of her,’ Goodie said, softening her words with a smile. Nick rubbed the back of his neck and grinned sheepishly.
‘Sorry, stupid idea.’
‘Not stupid … I just had a different childhood to you.’
For some reason Nick’s expression darkened and he clenched both hands into fists at his sides. ‘I know, Goodie, that’s actually what I wanted to talk to you about. You see, I know this chap … he’s pretty good with finding out about –’
‘Shhh,’ Goodie whispered; she had come around the kitchen island to stand in front of Nick and put her fingers on his lips. She didn’t know what he was banging on about, but it could wait. ‘I love that you try to do this for me,’ she told him, the fingers on his lips moving to slip into his thick hair and pull his head down to hers. Over the last month kissing had been a regular thing but Nick always put a stop there. Tonight Goodie was determined: she was not going to shut down and go somewhere else in her head, she was not going to just go through the motions with him, for the first time in her life she was going to allow herself to actuallyfeelsomething for someone.
‘I want you,’ she whispered into his mouth, and his whole body jerked in reaction before he lifted her up and sat her on the island, shoving pots and pans aside and sending them clattering to the floor. One of his hands went under her T-shirt and the other into her hair and he kissed her almost desperately before he leaned back and ripped her T-shirt up and over her head. He swallowed as he looked down at her and she could see his mind working behind his beautiful eyes. He wanted her but he wanted her to stayherewith him, he wanted her to really feel something. Goodie had never encountered any man who even gave the vaguest of shits where her mind was at, once she was willingly half-naked, and she felt her chest tighten as she looked up at him. Sitting up, she framed his face with both hands and stared into his eyes.
‘I’m here with you,’ she told him. ‘I will stay here, I promise. I want you.’ He scanned her face for a moment. Whatever he saw there must have reassured him because he then picked her up with her legs straddling his waist and walked her to his bedroom.
Chapter22
Fall in soldier
‘Hello,’Goodie murmured as Nick blinked slowly awake. Her head was resting on her hands on his chest, and her blue eyes were staring up into his.
‘Hey,’ Nick said, his voice thick with sleep. ‘How long have you been up?’
She smiled.
‘Little while,’ she told him, turning her head to lay it flat on her hands and then absently tracing patterns on his chest with her fingers. He brought both arms up around her to give her a firm squeeze, and then kissed the top of her head.
‘I need to tell you something,’ she said into the comfortable silence.
‘You can tell me anything, baby,’ he said into her hair, breathing in the clean, citrussy smell of her hair.
‘I …’ she broke off, then stopped tracing his chest for a moment to push up from him and stare into his eyes, ‘I am not whore.’
He frowned. ‘Goodie, honey, I know you’re not –’
‘I amnot,’ she told him, either ignoring or not taking in what he was saying, her face looking almost pained. ‘But I have done things … I have …’ She broke off again and closed her eyes slowly, taking a deep breath in through her nose before she continued. ‘I am not whore but I have had to do things that would make you think that maybe –’
‘Goodie, you don’t have to –’
‘Iwantto tell you this,’ she said, fierce determination lighting her eyes. ‘I need you to know that I may have been with those men but I was neverwiththem. You understand? Not like last night. Not like I was with you.’
‘I understand,’ he told her, all teasing leaving his voice, his expression suddenly serious. ‘Thank you for giving me that.’ Her blue eyes, so full of apprehension and tension, softened and her face lit with the widest smile he’d ever seen from her.
‘Jesus Christ,’ he muttered. ‘You are so unbelievably beautiful.’
Her smile faded and the delighted look on her face slowly changed to the one he recognized from last night as she moved to fully straddle him and slid her body up his chest. She kissed his neck, his jaw, his cheek, the corner of his eye, until finally she gave his ear a small nip and he laughed, flipped her underneath him and used both hands to push her hair out of her gorgeous, flushed, smiling face.
‘I’m glad you’ve only really been with me,’ he told her, kissing her lightly on the nose. ‘If you think about it you were actually kind of a virgin.’
Goodie snorted. ‘I amnotvirgin. Believe me.’
Nick grinned. ‘You are mine though.’
‘Yes.Lyobov moya,’* she whispered. ‘I am yours.’
* * *
‘But it’s ridiculous,’Nick said, the tone of his voice perilously close to a whinge. Goodie was learning that if there was one thing Nick liked it was to get his way.
‘Is not ridiculous,’ she told him, trying to pull her hand free – but unless she actually wanted to hurt him that would be an impossible task.
