“How long were you talking to my brother?” I asked in a low voice, snatching my hands away from his and taking a step back. Harry held up his hands again.
“Look, I know it’s a tricky subject and –”
“He’d no right to tell you any of that,” I snapped. The cold feeling of shame that I was unfortunately very familiar with washed over me in an automatic response. It didn’t seem to matter how much therapy I had, how many times I was reassured that what happened to us during our childhood wasn’t our fault – I could never get away from this feeling. The feeling of being unwanted, of not being lovable enough for my parents to bother looking after me. I knew the reality was that my parents were damaged themselves, that they were addicts, that they were selfish and that that wasn’t on me. But knowing and believing are two very separate things. And this man who now knew – I could see it in his eyes, heknew– this man had made me feel unwanted and vulnerable himself, not once but twice. He was the last person I wanted involved in my sordid family history. I was going to kill Heath for leaving me as exposed as this.
“I needed to knowsomething, Verity. He didn’t tell me much, just that my dad was right to have been worried.”
“There’s no reason for you to know.”
“I want a chance to–”
My throat felt tight then and it was a struggle to get out the rest of my words, but I pushed through. “I left you so many messages, Harry. Ibeggedyou to speak to me.”
Harry shifted uncomfortably. “My parents were so angry. Everything was totally messed up and I was an insecure little bitch who was only too ready to believe the worst.”
“Even if all your insecure teenager bullshit had merit. That doesn’t change how you treated me last year. Or how you’ve treated me since that day in the boardroom when you threw your Big Dick Energy around to make some sort of bullshit point. Or all the times you’ve tried to undermine me since.”
“I know,” he said, his voice strained and hoarse. “All I can say is how sorry I am. I wish I could go back and change things. Not just the last year but the last twenty years. But I’m here now. Please just give me a chance to–”
“Harry, I’ve been unwanted since the day I was born,” I said, my voice as cold as the feeling that had washed over me. “By the people who were genetically predisposed to love and care for me. I’m not going to waste my time now with somebody else who makes me feel unwanted.”
“God, Verity,” he said, his face paling at my words. “I had no idea about any of that. I’m so sorry. I should have–”
“I don’t want to go into it. It’s over now. Listen, for the sake of the project let’s just… call a truce. Okay?”
Harry narrowed his eyes and moved a little closer. His face was still pale with shock but his mouth was set in a stubborn line – not a good sign with Harry. Bloody hell, he was so handsome it almost hurt to look at him. I felt my pulse rate pick up and that familiar pull towards him. “Does calling a truce involve you ever letting me kiss you again?”
“No, it does not,” I said, my hands going to my hips.
Harry rubbed his stubble for a moment lost in thought. “Does it involve you agreeing to have dinner with me?”
I huffed out an exasperated breath. His mouth was quirked at the corners now in a half smile. “Absolutely not.”
“Hmm.” He studied me for a moment. “Can I drive you home?”
“Harry, I live in Dorset. That’s over two hours drive.”
“So?”
“No, no you cannot drive me home, you lunatic. Anyway, I’m sure you have an early start tomorrow making more billions for billionaires – go do that.”
He stared at me for a moment and then whispered, “I can’t stop thinking about you.” It took all my self-control to stay where I was and not fall into him. I felt my breathing speed up and a flush spread from my chest to my neck, but I managed to force myself to take a step back.
“Try,” I said before spinning on my heel and stalking away from him towards Heath and the others. As I was crossing the space my Harry-addled mind did register the pause in the music and the compère speaking to the crowd to announce the winners of the Sustainable Housing UK award. I heard Max’s name and mine being called out, and turned to the stage, forcing myself to put on a shaky smile.
Chapter12
I was a patient man
Harry
“Max, what’s going on?” Verity said as she pushed open his glass door.
Both Max and I stood up. She scowled at me in response to my low wave and half smile. She did not however attempt to throw a brick at me like she had on site a few weeks ago which I counted as progress (to be fair there wasn’t actually a brick to hand in Max’s office, but she could have gone for the stapler or something).
“Hi Verity,” I said, ignoring her fierce stance and obvious annoyance.
“Why ishehere?”
