“You couldn’t have had a haircut for today?” she asked, and I rolled my eyes. Reunion or not, some things stayed the same.
Chapter 14
All I needed
Urvi
Boundaries.
I was getting better with them.
My family may have changed their tune, but I wasn’t quite ready to let them in yet. After the performance I went to have coffee with them, although I was firm with Jack that I needed to do it on my own. I listened to their apologies and I accepted them. But I couldn’t take down my self-protective wall. Not yet. They’d hurt me and I wasn’t going to get past that in just one afternoon. Roles had reversed and now it wasthemaskingmewhen they could see me again when we finished, them trying to make me accept their money. Mum got so upset that I didn’t even have the heart to tell them about the diabetes. It could wait. Rahul told me he was getting married next year. He asked if I would be a bridesmaid and I had to say no. Not to be harsh, not to be petty - but I hadn’t even met his bride-to-be. I wasn’t going to slot into the perfect daughter and sister role I’d been ejected from a year and a half ago that easily. It would take time.
Later on I arrived back at the flat and was faced with an impatient-looking Jack.
“Why are you standing around outside?” I asked as he pushed off from the wall beside the intercom.
“Kira wouldn’t let me in,” he grumbled. “I think she gets some sort of sick pleasure from watching me suffer.”
“When did you get here? Have you been out here all afternoon?” My voice rose in disbelief as he slowly nodded.
“Urvi,” he reached for me but I flinched away and he sighed. “I couldn’t risk not catching you then being blocked again. I need to speak to you. The John Lewis ad, it’s not what you think. That’s not what –”
“Iheardyou Jack,” I told him. “I gave you the benefit of the doubt after the way you treated me on the boat. But it’s so obvious that you only paid me attention after you knew I would be useful to you.” My voice broke on the last few words and I looked away.
“Urvi no,” he groaned. “How can you believe that when I . . . when we . . .” He stepped towards me and took my face in his hands. My resolve wavered for a moment. He looked almost pained as he stared down at me. “Okay, look we don’t have to sort this all out now. I just need to know how you are. Is the monitor working? Are you-?”
“I’m fine,” I cut him off, stepping back from his grasp and pushing my hair behind my ears. “The monitor is helping no end.” I bit my lip and let it go, crossing my arms over my chest. “Thank you,” I muttered. “You don’t know how much it’s meant to me.”
His shoulders sagged. “I wasn’t bringing it up for you to thank me. I don’t want you feeling indebted to me. I –”
“I’ll pay you back,” I told him. “As soon as I can. It might not be for a little while but –”
“Urvi,” he snapped, and when I glanced up at him again I saw anger and frustration flash in his eyes. “You’renotgoing to pay me back. That was a gift. It was a few hundred quid, that’s pocket change to me.”
I stiffened and sank further into humiliation. Pocket change. An amount it would likely take months for me to pay back waspocket changeto him. He must have noticed my discomfort because he groaned again.
“That was badly put. You know I don’t –”
“I’ve got to go,” I whispered, taking a step back from him towards the entrance of my building. His hand shot out to grab mine and stop my retreat. For a moment I felt a wave of contentment as his large, warm, dry hand enclosed mine. It felt so right it was terrifying. But I wasn’t falling for his bullshit charm again. I shook my head to clear it and snatched my hand away, darting into the building before he could stop me. I turned back to him before I let the door shut
“I’ll do the ad, okay. I’ll do it formebecause I would be an idiot not to. But after that Ineverwant to see you again.”
*****
“Hey!” I looked up from the mojito I was putting together to see Ben waving at me from the other side of the bar. “Drama queen, can I get a beer?”
“I’m not a drama queen,” I muttered, shooting him an irritated look. I hadn’t seen him since Saint-Tropez and I would rather not do it in a crowded bar.
He rolled his eyes as I poured out the three cocktails into tall glasses. “Could have fooled me,” he said. “Swooning all over the place –”
“I had a hypoglycaemic blackout!” I snapped. “That’s hardly dra –”
“Keeping your phone number so secret that I’d have more luck finding out the KFC recipe? Turning my friend into an over-emotional mess who makes bad business decisions?”
“What?” I asked as I moved down the bar to give out the cocktails to the waiting ladies. Ben moved with me and elbowed some people out of the way to draw level with me at the cash register. The cocktail girls eyed him with interest but moved away when he didn’t even spare them a glance.
“Can I speak to you? Please?”
