‘Yes, Frankie, you do.’
I was shaking my head frantically. I didn’t think I’d ever been as embarrassed in my life.
‘And a woman who looks like you, who is as successful and popular as you, does not freeze out a man she’s attracted to.’
‘I … I … I, successful?’
He ignored my question and continued to shake my world on its foundations. ‘You should know: I’m attracted to you as well.’ His hand at my elbow had put on gentle pressure to shift me to face him, and he took a step towards me so that he was firmly in my personal space.
I looked into his gorgeous clear blue eyes and smelt his clean, citrusy masculine smell, which I’d caught before but never this close. Shaking my head in an attempt to clear it, I took a small step back.
‘What?’ I whispered.
‘I’m attracted to you,’ he repeated, taking another step into my space. I took another back and pulled my eyes away from his with some effort, scanning the room for any signs of hidden cameras, or hints that this was a cruel practical joke.
‘But … but you … you can’t be attracted to me. You don’t even like me.’
He closed his eyes and clenched his jaw. When he opened them they were filled with what looked like regret and maybe even pain.
‘Frankie, please, please,’ he pleaded. ‘I know I’ve been a complete tosser, and maybe I can’t fix what’s gone before enough for you to give me a chance, but please believe me when I say that I more than like you.’
My eyes slid to the side and I tried to take another step back but came up against the fridge door. Tom took that opportunity to step right into my space and curl the hand that wasn’t at my elbow around the back of my neck. I stopped breathing altogether.
‘What are you doing?’ I whispered to the worn logo on the T-shirt stretched across his broad chest, which was directly in my eye-line, seeing as I was too freaked out to look up at his face. The hand that had curled round my neck went to my jaw to tilt my head back so that he could capture my eyes with his own.
‘I’m trying to get through those shields you’ve got up. I’m hoping that it will penetrate when I say I like you a fuck of a lot and have done for a long fucking time.’
Okay, he was swearing. I had learnt from working with Tom that he wasn’t shy of the odd f-word. He didn’t swear as much as Lou (although I doubted that was even possible) but when he did it was a sure-fire sign that he was nearing the edge of his patience. I bit my lip and my brows drew together in confusion.
Before I could stop myself, I asked a question which could have a heartbreaking answer. ‘Why?’
‘Why?’ he asked and it was his turn to look confused. ‘Are you serious?’
‘Um … well, yes.’ And I was. I had no idea why he would say he liked me when he had made it very clear in the past that he seriouslydid not. Not to mention that Thomas G. Longley liking me was against all the laws of the known universe.
His eyes softened and his thumb swept across my jaw. I stopped breathing again and vaguely wondered if I would pass out from lack of oxygen.
‘I like your cakes,’ he told me.
Right. Bit weird as an opener, but even I had to admit I baked good cakes.
‘But more than that, I like that you bake them for the whole department.’
‘Okay,’ I said slowly.
‘Not just the bosses and other docs, but everyone. You even brought in a birthday cake for one of the porters.’
‘Um … well itwashis birthday.’ Tom was usually a pretty rational guy; this discussion of porters and cake-baking was a little random.
‘Frankie, I don’t really know any of the porters.’ Well that wasn’t very nice, although I suspected probably true. Still, I didn’t get how it was relevant. ‘I would never know if it was one of their birthdays and I’ve worked there for years. I like that you know them. I like that you care about them so much you’d go to the trouble of baking a cake. I like how kind you are, how loyal you are to your friends.
‘I get it now. I get that you’re shy. I thought you were cold, but kept getting glimpses of the real you and it didn’t gel. With other people you were so warm, always smiling, laughing. I could tell you were lighting up their day just by being with them, and I was jealous that you wouldn’t shine that light on me.
‘A handful of times I managed to see the real you. A couple when you forgot yourself and shared your humour with me, and a couple when you stood up to me. Never for yourself and how I was treating you, always for the patients. Knowing now how shy you are with me, I can see that that must have taken courage; but you were willing to do it because you care. That’s why I like you. As for why I’m attracted to you, I would start by saying that you’re probably the most beautiful women I have ever seen in real life.’
‘What!’ I squeaked, my eyes as round as saucers. He was deranged. He had totally lost his mind. I almost felt sorry for him. He searched my face, his eyes warm and his lips tipping up in a small smile.
‘Jesus, you really have no idea do you? How is that even possible?’
