‘I’m sorry, that was rude,’ he said.
‘It’s fine,’ Millie told him before she could stop herself, and then watched his lips twitch.
‘I really just wanted to ask you about speaking at the Grand Round.’
‘Oh,’ Millie said, breathing a sigh of relief. She was always much better if she knew the context of the interaction with another person. Now she understood. Mr Martakis wanted her to speak at the Grand Round. That was why he was talking to her. Whilst she felt relief to have his approach explained, there was a tiny part of her, buried deep, that was disappointed. ‘I can’t do that.’
‘Of course you can,’ he said. ‘It’ll be a great warm-up for speaking at conferences.’
‘Conferences?’ The word came out strangled and Millie cleared her throat. ‘I won’t be talking at any conferences.’
‘But you’ve made a big breakthrough, Dr Morrison. People will want to hear what you have to say.’
‘I’ve published my findings,’ she said, her voice still high and tight. ‘I … look, I just can’t …’
‘You can.’ Mr Martakis’ face was set with determination. ‘I’ve set it all up for the week after next.’
‘No.’
Mr Martakis blinked. ‘You can’t just say an outright no, that’s not –’
Millie could feel a ringing in her ears; she knew she was breathing too fast.
‘My answer is no,’ she said through gritted teeth. The very idea of public speaking was making her come out in a cold sweat. She swallowed, glanced behind her to see another exit a bit further away, and she ran. On the way through she collided with a huge man covered in tattoos, who steadied her to stop her going down.
‘Hey, what’s up?’ the giant asked, taking in her pale face and wide, fearful eyes. He looked over her shoulder. Millie could hear Mr Martakis calling after her. The huge man’s jaw clenched tight and his eyes narrowed. ‘Don’t you worry, miss,’ he told her. ‘I’ll deal with this joker.’ Millie didn’t wait to see what ‘dealing with this joker’ might entail. As soon as the giant released her she was off.
She didn’t stop shaking until she was in the back of a taxi five minutes later. This had been a mistake. She knew her limits. It was just that, recently, living within those limits had felt so very lonely. As the taxi took her all the way back to her boring house and her narrow life she felt a dull ache in her chest, but she didn’t cry.
Millie never cried.
Chapter 2
Him
‘Ki-Ki! Please!’ groaned Libby, chucking a bread roll at Kira’s head. ‘Can we not talk aboutmysex life. God.’
Kira rolled her eyes. ‘Libby, it’s not like I’ve been going through the dong-meets-foo-foo logistics or anything. I just think you guys should have a dirty weekend away. Maybe then you’d be a bit less vomit-worthy around us more sexually frustrated mortals. And you could do with a break. You know you could.’ Libby had only just recovered from a bout of pneumonia. There was real concern behind Kira’s teasing.
‘We are not vomit-worthy,’ Libby hissed in outrage.
‘Uh, Lib,’ Pav cut in. ‘That would hold a lot more water if Jamie hadn’t had his hand on your leg under the table for the last ten minutes, and if you hadn’t sent him a dirty text just now.’
Libby’s face flamed bright red as Jamie jerked both his hands onto the table-top and swept his phone up into his pocket. ‘I did not send him a dirty text,’ she hissed, and Pav rolled his eyes. ‘I didn’t, I just –’
‘Okay, maybe notdirtydirty but I bet there were a few emojis involved.’
‘Yeah,’ Kira said, sitting forward in her chair. ‘You probably sent a couple of aubergines and a crazy ghost. Am I right?’
‘Wh … what are you –’
‘Don’t act all innocent you frisky little minx. You know exactly what I’m talking about.’
Pav started laughing whilst Jamie’s eyes were dancing and his mouth was pressed into a firm line. The filthy look Libby shot Jamie as his shoulders started to shake only served to increase the volume of Pav’s merriment. He shook his head in his amusement and something caught his attention out of the corner of his eye. She was standing completely still across the canteen, and her perfectly made-up face was staring straight at him. It was her expression that surprised him.
Just for that moment she didn’t have her standard uptight, aloof mask in place. Instead the corners of her mouth were tilted up ever so slightly and her eyes were warm. For some bizarre reason her expression seemed almost … longing. However it didn’t take long for her to notice his stare. Her face shut down again and her eyes slid away as she practically ran over to the new coffee stand.
‘Don’t you think, Pav? Pav?’
