“Don't slide under the table,” Dave chastised. “There's nowhere to hide your shame here, buddy.”
“Oh man,” I groaned. “Please don't tell Kamran you know.”
I let my head fall onto the table and the room started spinning like I was on the strawberry ride at the fair.
“Here,” Dave said, cracking a can open and holding it under my face. “I brought provisions, tell me everything.”
Sighing, I pushed myself up again and took the offered drink.
“Dave,” I said, about to tell him off. “It's a hot mess. A perfect, amazing,wonderful, hot mess.”
He and Ollie exchanged an amused look.
“Go on,” Dave said, sipping his drink while I told them almost everything—minus the juicier details because those were mine.
“Damn, so he just went all in like that?” he asked. “That's...unexpected.”
I nodded solemnly.
“Itisthe best thing that’s ever happened,” I agreed.
His lips quirked.
“Wow. I'm just realizing that I've never seen you in love before. It's so…cute.”
“Cute?” I demanded. “I'm notcute.I'm super secssy.”
I finished the can he'd given me and put my hand out for another. Ollie popped the top on one and offered it to me.
“Also, youhaveseen me in love before. I've been in love for years and years.”
“Really?” Dave asked, looking thoughtful.
I nodded, remembering the first time I'd met Kamran, and how everything had just fallen into place. I'd known I was gay already, had been on the verge of making it public and then we'd hit it off and he'd taken me under his wing. He’d introduced me to his friends and they were all so...straight.I'd been afraid of not fitting in. On top of that, on nights out we crashed on the same couches sometimes, changed together at the gym, the list went on… I hadn't wanted him to feel differently around me and I also hadn't wanted to lose him, especially since by then, I was already head over heels.
“I don't think I've ever been able to just... be real,” I found myself saying.
“You can’t do that now though, can you?” Ollie asked after a moment. “I mean, he’s still married. Kamranhas tosort that out before you go open with it.”
“I can't even wrap my head around him being with a guy,” Dave said. “No offence, I know you two have a thing. I more mean the... being openly affectionate side, I guess. He's not really like that.”
“Not with Melissa,” I shrugged, feeling defensive again. “But he's different with me when we're alone together.”
“But out in the open,” Dave argued before Ollie placed a hand on his arm, stopping him from saying more.
“He's talking to Melissa today,” I said. “You'll see. Once they're done...”
I trailed off, remembering that I'd sent Kamran that message.
Reaching into my pocket, I pulled out my phone.
It took a couple tries for my clumsy fingers to swipe the messages open. There was one there from Kamran.
Need a bit more time. Will call you tomorrow.
I stared at the message for ages, not hearing what the guys were saying and barely registering their concerned voices.
Suddenly, the phone was yanked out of my hand.
