“Very well. I think you need to spend some time with Sally,” he replied.
Leonard felt a pang of guilt at Kenneth’s words, knowing all too well the expectations that rested upon his shoulders. “Kenny, you still harbor hopes that I’ll fall in love with her, don’t you?” he asked quietly, his gaze searching Kenneth’s face for any hint of affirmation.
Kenneth sighed, his expression softening with understanding. “I want what’s best for both of you, Leonard,” he admitted. “But ultimately, it’s up to you to decide what that looks like. What I do know is that you ignoring her is not going to benefit either of you.”
“Did she complain to you about me?” he asked, hoping this was so, so he might have a reason to dislike her, for there was nothing he despised more than a tattletale. Alas, Kenneth shook his head.
“She did not. She would never. It was easy to see she was displeased by my presence, given it meant your plans with her had to change. Had I known you had plans, I would not have come at all. As for her complaining, no. It’s rather the opposite. I offered to speak to you, and she refused, telling me she was her own woman and could stand up for herself.”
Leonard paused at this and looked up at his friend. “Did she?”
“Indeed. You do not give Sally enough credit. She is a force to be reckoned with. Like all Blackmore women. You would do well to get to know her, no matter your reasons for not wanting love. Which I think are foolish, still,” Kenneth said.
Not taking the bait, Leonard shook his head, a sense of resolve settling over him. He knew he couldn’t continue to avoid facing his responsibilities. “I’ll do my best,” he promised, meaning it.
As Kenneth bid him farewell and departed, Leonard remained outside the manor. Taking a deep breath, he steeled himself for what lay ahead, knowing that he had to try to bridge the divide between himself and Sally.
It was time to end his procrastination and face the challenges of his new marriage head-on.
As he entered the manor again, he found the parlor empty and briefly exhaled. Perhaps Sally had given up? Oddly, this thought filled him with a little apprehension because some of him had to admit he liked her determination. She was strong-willed and knew what must be done to make their arranged marriage look real. He did also, but he didn’t have the strength to truly commit to anything that involved being around her. Sally had a power to her, something almost magnetic that drew him to her even when he knew he had to stay far away.
Sally’s footsteps echoed through the corridor then as she suddenly reappeared. Her eyes were irritated, and he saw her hands curled into balls at her side.
“Sa...” he started, but she cut him off, her anger boiling.
“Where have you been all day?” she demanded. “We were supposed to spend our honeymoon together, Leonard. Remember? You already avoided me the entire week before our marriage and now this? How is anyone supposed to believe this arrangement is real?”
Leonard met her gaze, his expression heavy with guilt as he took in her fiery demeanor. He knew he had failed her. “I’m sorry, Sally,” he began. “I thought... I thought I was doing what was best for both of us.”
Sally’s eyes narrowed, her frustration bubbling to the surface. “What’s best for us is sticking to the plan we agreed upon,” she retorted, her tone sharp with anger. “Not leaving me to fend for myself while you remain hidden away in your study all day long.”
Leonard felt a pang of remorse pierce his heart at her words. He had been so consumed by his fears and uncertainties that he hadn’t considered how his actions impacted Sally. “I know,” he admitted. “I know I’ve let you down, Sally, and I’m truly sorry for that.”
She paused, looking up at him out of green eyes that were filled with confusion. She hadn’t expected him to back down so quickly, had she?
“I know how important it is that we are seen together,” he continued. His gaze shifted to the floor as he struggled to contain the turmoil raging within him. He knew he was hurting Sally with his indifference, but he couldn’t risk exposing his vulnerability and couldn’t allow himself to become too attached when their marriage was founded on duty rather than desire. Still, he had to stick by his promise. A Duke’s word was worth its weight in gold, his mother used to say. He scoffed inwardly. Had she meant this? Or had she meant every Duke’s word except for her husband’s? For surely she had already known that her husband’s word was worth nothing.
“Leonard?” Sally’s voice drew him back to the here and now. “I asked what you intend to do now. I see you have settled on ignoring me still.” She crossed her arms.
“I am not. I was considering what to do now. I suppose what we were meant to do from the beginning, was be seen together. I dare say it is getting too late to bring out the horses and ride the estate, but we could walk, if you like. I can show you the estate, and a few of the tenants shall see us,” he shrugged.
She paused and looked at him as if she wasn’t quite sure what to make of his proposal. Of course, she had to suspect some kind of ulterior motive, and he almost hated himself for that. He didn’t want her to think badly of him.
“I mean it, Sally,” he said. “We must be seen together, you are right. I told you we would spend this month together and then go our separate ways, and I will stick by it. I promise.”
She wetted her lips, a sheen appearing on them that sent a shiver down his spine. For a moment, he wondered what it might be like to kiss those lovely red lips of hers. Would she taste the strawberries the cook served at breakfast? Or of salt from the porridge? Or would she have her own unique taste?
No! I must stop this foolishness at once. This will not do. Do not get pulled in...
“I will be glad to go with you. Just let me change out of this morning attire and I will get my half-boots. I will meet you outside,” she said, her tone different, lighter - as if a load had been lifted off her shoulders. Then, she turned away and rushed up the stairs, her reddish hair bouncing behind her where it had come out of its bun.
Leonard looked after her, his feelings more confused than ever. He wanted to follow her and explain his actions, his words - but he knew he could not. Nobody could ever know how awful a man his father had been, how he had wronged his mother, his workers, and everyone.
As he stood there, he closed his eyes and thought back to the man he’d admired for so long. If only his father had been the man, Leonard thought him to be. If only he hadn’t turned out to be such a rotten man ... He would not have had to keep these secrets and would not have had to pretend not to care for Sally. His life would be easier; all their lives would be.
Alas, the late Duke of Chester had been a monster in disguise. A horrid man. And one who had paid for his actions with his life .... leaving his son to deal with the consequences.
CHAPTER14
