When he had left the room, Lord Harlston turned to Valeria. “I’m so sorry if I said anything hurtful,” he said quietly. “If I’ve said or done anything to make you feel upset.”
“No need to worry,” Valeria said. “It was my decision to end the courtship.”
“I see,” Lord Harlston said. “You know…” He trailed off.
“What?” Valeria prompted him.
“Well, I did wonder whether it might not be a bit… soon,” he said apologetically. “Given everything you went through with your brother. It seemed to have had such an effect on you that I wondered whether you might not appreciate a few months of quiet to grow accustomed to life here with your aunt and cousin.”
“Oh, that’s so thoughtful of you,” Valeria said.
He smiled. “Well, I care about people,” he said. “I’m glad that you and I are getting this opportunity to spend a little more time together, even though I’m very sorry for the circumstances that brought it about.”
“No need to be sorry,” Valeria said. “It’s for the best, really.”
And for the first time since she had ended her courtship, she began to really believe it. She could see the light at the other side of all of this. Maybe she wouldn’t be unhappy forever after all. Maybe she had simply taken her first step toward something—though she didn’t know yet what that something might be—that would make her happier than she had ever been.
Chapter 29
Thomas paced the floor of the pub. Once or twice, he glanced toward the seat over which he had hung his jacket when he had come in. He knew he ought to sit down. He was creating a scene by pacing around like this. People were beginning to stare at him.
But he couldn’t help it.
Everything had gone wrong so quickly. More quickly than he would have believed possible.
After the first visit from Crowle, the one in which he had been advised that the collection of his debt would now be prioritized, he had felt himself become closed off and awkward. He had visited with Lady Valeria the very next day, but he had known that he couldn’t possibly allow himself to divulge what was going on in his life.
He had no way to explain, therefore, the sudden shift in his behavior. He had seen her struggling to understand it, and a part of him had very much wished that he could explain. She was so understanding with him.
She really deserves much better. I’m not surprised she realized it. I’m not surprised she ended things.
He had hoped, though, that he might be able to resolve the whole matter without her ever realizing what was going on. That someday, after they were married and all of this was behind them, he might tell her that he had been plagued by a debt collector early in their courtship, and that she might laugh and say that she had knownsomethingwas going on, and that it all made much more sense now. With time and distance, surely it would all seem funny.
But no time had passed at all. Only a couple of days. And then Duncan had come to his home with the unpleasant news that the courtship was to be discontinued.
He had looked supremely uncomfortable as he had broken the news. “It isn’t that she dislikes you, Thomas,” he’d said. “You know that isn’t it.”
“What is it, then?” Thomas had asked.
“You already know,” Duncan had said. “I think you must.”
“It’s that debt collector.”
“He came around our Manor, pestering Mother. Asking questions about you.”
Thomas had felt ill. “I can’t believe he would do that. We made an arrangement. I told him I would pay him.”
“I think it frightened Valeria,” Duncan said. “She believes you’ll be pulled into illegal activity out of desperation to settle your debt.”
“I’m sure Crowle hopes for nothing less,” Thomas had said, his voice rough and bitter. “You know what he does. He gives the names of those who owe debts to the seediest members of the underground so that they can recruit the desperate into their nefarious doings.”
“Does he really?” Duncan had looked aghast, and Thomas had been rather forcibly reminded of the charmed life his friend led. Duncan had never had cause to worry about debt collectors, or about being lured into a life of crime.
Not that I would ever turn to criminal activity, he thought now, feeling furious and defiant.No matter what happens—no matter what I owe, or what I am threatened with—I will never stoop to such depths. I will never forget what kind of man I am!
But that was what Lady Valeria’s own brother had done. He had allowed his fear over the possibility of sinking beneath his debt to turn him to a life of crime. And he had ended up behind bars for it.
Of course she’s afraid of me. Of course she thinks I might be headed down that same dark path.
